rhymeswithpurple

ICLS 2008

2008-06-25T00:19:00.001-07:00

I'm over in the Netherlands (first timer) and enjoying my time in Utrecht. The technical university is here, about a 40 minute train ride south from Amsterdam. Currently, the mayor of the city is offering a welcome.

First impressions of the Dutch are good ones. Wonderful coffee, pleasant and patient people who are tall and striking. My folks say that I have some Dutch heritage, but I don't know of any Van [somethings] in my family tree. I'll need to look more into that.

Open High School of Utah

2008-06-07T11:52:00.000-07:00

For those that didn't catch the announcement from David, the charter was approved to open the (virtual) doors of our high school. It's called the Open High School of Utah, and it's special because it will be the first school that uses all open materials in its curriculum. The open materials mean that they are free to anyone who wants to use them, the school will have its materials online so that anyone who has internet access can get to them.

There are a lot of details to work out, still, but this is a huge step! I'm pleased to be associated with it, as co-founder, board member and curriculum advisor (all from Dave's doing, I must say). Stay tuned to David's blog, and the school website (I'll put it up once it's made), for more information.

the conversations between profs and students

2008-06-07T11:32:00.000-07:00

I recently watched Lions for Lambs. It was a fairly interesting movie, more about offering some political and foreign strategy opinions than entertainment, probably. One of the aspects of the movie I enjoyed was that it was offered in real-time, with multiple stories paralleling and intersecting each other. One of the story lines had Robert Redford's character in an hour-long meeting with one of his students. They discussed attendance and grades, participation in his (Redford's) class, sociopolitical stances and what it means to make a difference in government as an individual. At one point, Redford offers the student a "B" if he chooses to never come to class again, do no readings and offer no further participation, including to not sign up for any future classes or have future interactions with the professor. The idea behind this offer was to make the student choose: would he rather sit on the sidelines and watch the action, or would he rather become involved in what is happening around him. A choice for complacency versus action, to be satisfied, or act in an effort to make a difference.

If offering that choice to most students, what would they choose? This student remarked that given this choice, most students would jump at the chance for a B. In my experience, unfortunately, he might be right. But like Redford's character, I would probably only offer that kind of choice to students I didn't think would take it. What percentage of my students would that be? Really, it's not an ethical offer to make, so I wouldn't do it. But I wonder how many profs. might jump at the chance to make deals, just to make certain that they never see certain students again...

And if you're into conversations between students and professors, or at least, one-on-one interactions, there's probably nothing that I've seen that's scarier than Oleanna. I'd recommend it to everyone that doesn't get nauseous at Mamet's writing. I love the movie, it scares me to death.

10 questions

2007-06-19T00:06:00.000-07:00

We recently watched "Inside the Actor's Studio" and it cracks me up how ridiculous and important actors consider themselves. The only redeeming and entertaining portion, to me, is the ten questions by Bernard Pivot that host James Lipton asks every guest:

What is your favorite word?
What is your least favorite word?
What turns you on [creatively, spiritually or emotionally]?
What turns you off?
What sound or noise do you love?
What sound or noise do you hate?
What is your favorite curse word?
What profession other than your own would you like to attempt?
What profession would you not like to do?
If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates?

Since this is my blog, and I get to be just as arrogant as actors here, I'll take my shot.

What is your favorite word? "lickety-split"
What is your least favorite word? "literally"
What turns you on [creatively, spiritually or emotionally]? rain: the smell, sound and feel of it
What turns you off? traffic...well, crowds of most kind
What sound or noise do you love? the sound my son makes when happy
What sound or noise do you hate? a loved one in pain (people make the best and worst sounds, really)
What is your favorite curse word? all of them, I like to switch my favorites regularly
What profession other than your own would you like to attempt? small business owner
What profession would you not like to do? most physician careers, with the possible exception of orthopedic surgeon
If Heaven exists, what would you like to hear God say when you arrive at the Pearly Gates? "Just how I like 'em--a guy with no regrets."

what's up with the D&D cartoon orcs vs. the Return of the Jedi soldiers?

2007-01-28T23:10:00.000-08:00

Yeah, that's a super-long title for a blog post. But seriously, the orcs from the Dungeons & Dragons cartoons look extremely similar to the pig-looking guards in Jabba the Hut's palace in Return of the Jedi. Has no one made this connection before? I mean, even their clothing looks the same, but the green-skinned biped that is the pig-soldier is the same in both shows. What's up with that?

Anyone have the energy of finding some photos of each and posting them up? I'd be most obliged.

Speaking of nothing in particular, I thought I'd give an update on my hockey skills. Eventually I'd hope they become "skillz" but we're not quite there yet. Anyway, today I had maybe my best game ever. I scored a nice goal (lifted it over the goalie on the short side, top shelf, quite
impressive!), I had a nice assist to Greg for another goal, and I (of course) took a 2 minute penalty for "roughing." To me, that's probably the best tri-fecta I could have hoped for!

And the guy I took the penality on had to leave the game. Not that I'm proud of that, mind you, but let's just say that the crease is mine. Got it?!

Just had to share. I'm particularly missing friends in Seatown about now, hope all remains up there, and I hope to be back soon.

Untitled

2007-01-18T13:38:00.000-08:00

what I want
when events of the now turn to thoughts of the past
and people in my life fall into place
repast

some with purpose, some at random, but desperate
like the lambs of jame gum
the ghosts that haunt me
don't seem to get tired
the dreams that hunt me
pursue
reviewing the memories that strike me
bluntly

give me too much pause
two much cause
to blunt me

-Shelton Brett, January 18, 2006

coffee is for closers

2007-01-10T13:45:00.000-08:00

We now have one of the (sigh) national coffee chains in the small town where I live, and I reluctantly admit that I'm not only a user of their services, I really like them. I know when I lived in Seattle it was extremely hip to throw your nose in the air and walk swiftly pass the Starbucks and into the local mom-and-pop place to support the little guy. And usually, the coffee was better anyway.

Now, after having lived so long in a place where the little guy coffee is marginal and inconsistent, I admit to looking forward to driving to the green and white lettering and ploppoing down $5.95 for my Big Mac of coffees. Yes, a little piece of me cringes, but when that consistent, perfect temperature of soy chai latte (venti, of course) slides down my throat, the guilt is washed away. Yum. Well, almost all the guilt.

But isn't this picture great? "Put that coffee down. Coffee is for closers." I think it was this turn as the corporate pusher in Glengarry Glen Ross that Alec Baldwin really took hold as a great scene-stealer. Sure we loved him in Malice, but really, when did he become this great comedic talent? He stole the movie in Along Came Polly and watching him in SNL is fantastic. Anyway, I suggest that when you watch Glengarry Glen Ross you don't accidently leave your outdoor speakers on, set at "11." And definitely not in rural Utah (thanks for the story, Quinton).

2006-12-28T22:38:00.000-08:00

new blogs

2006-12-28T22:14:00.000-08:00

Okay, so this is the blog to apologize for the absence of previous blogs, but that's not what blogging is supposed to be about. It's here for when I need it, and to use it, and it just so happens that I did need it this last semester yet did not take advantage of it. A lesson to myself: do not take this for granted, I know that this helps, and I need to keep leaking the stuff here so that the rest is worthwhile. Okay. Done with self-lecture. I apologize to myself and it's time to move on.

There's this "new" blog that I'm getting offered that has to do with Google somehow, maybe I'll migrate to that. If anything changes, I'll be sure to post it here.

BTW, it seems fellow bloggers are going to a variety of hotspots, including facebook and myspace, and also creating new accounts on blogger. I suppose it's all good, just keeping up my RSS feed has been the chore.

Not a bunch I want to share with the world, except perhaps my greatest feat to date, this picture should tell the story.

Bologna

2006-08-24T22:13:00.000-07:00

I just saw a great new commercial for Oscar Meyer bologna on TV. Actually, it was an old commercial, in the exact same form and song of the original: with many a young child singing the "Oscar Meyer" song in out-of-tune phrases that also missed a few words. Delightful.

I remember eating bologna (always pronounced "baloney" in my neighborhood) in sandwiches as a kid, and looooving them. I mean really loving that stuff. Maybe a little mustard, maybe a little butter, (never any mayo for me), but always enjoying a nice sandwich ideally between two slices of white (but yes, I had a mother that often threw in some wheat when I wasn't looking).

Tasty.

I think I also ate hot dogs. You know, the raw ones. Straight out of the fridge in the 12 pack, just for a snack. I don't remember thinking, "Damn, these things are great when not warmed up and not in a bun," but when you're hungry as a kid, some things are just going to do. That was the situation with raw hot dogs. Don't even get me started on the Sucrets as "candy" issue I had around, oh, 1st grade.

Anyway, the reason I bring this up is because I saw the commercial and really had to think the last time I had bologna. (I still sing the song when I type it: B O L O G N A). I mean, I haven't had a bologna sandwich since I was a kid, and can't remember that time. I did, on a trip to Germany a few years back, order the "meatlof" off of the menu and had a big slice of what I presume was similar to bologna, but I don't think that counts since Darmstadt was somewhat recovering from Octoberfest at the time. I didn't eat it. And I went back to eating sausage and saurkraut for the remainder of my meals (awesome!) that trip.

Anyway, maybe I look forward to eventually having kids. I mean, yes, I do, and perhaps my return to bologna as a staple is part of that. Maybe.

the Easter egg Easter egg

2006-08-14T11:42:00.000-07:00

As found in GTA: Vice City.

word cloud

2006-07-06T07:17:00.000-07:00

"Water"

2006-07-05T12:08:00.002-07:00

Take a Picture Filter
Rock-N-Roll Records (Ain't Sellin' This Year) Supersuckers
Vitamin R (Leading Us Along) Chevelle
Your Name On A Grain Of Rice Roger Clyne & the Peacemakers
Mr. Brightside Killers
Calypso John Denver
The Anthem Good Charlotte
The Outsider A Perfect Circle
The Wreck Of The Edmund Fitzgerald Gordon Lightfoot
Pain Jimmy Eat World
The Rock Show Blink-182
Nada The Refreshments
Johnny Tarr Gaelic Storm
Turn The Page Metallica
Modern Day Cowboy Tesla
Simple Man Lynrd Skynrd
Gato Negro Supersuckers
Fiddle And The Drum A Perfect Circle

Easter egg classic

2006-07-03T21:48:00.000-07:00

So I enjoy, from time to time, checking out the "hidden" items on DVDs and seeing all the special features that others tend to overlook. I believe the whole thing started with some items found in early programs, mostly games, that had a "secret room" or feature that only the programmers knew about, and somehow slipped it in the final version of the program under the radar of the execs, as sort of an inside joke amongst themselves. The first one I remember discovering was a little room in the original Atari 2600 game Adventure--some people say it was the first such thing of the sort, the one that got it all started. The idea has since blossomed to refer to secret items in TV shows, movies/DVDs, all sorts of business software and of course, video games. Special websites such as this one are dedicated to forums for people to post discoveries and discuss the merits of Easter eggs (or even if they qualify as such) and I get the impression that some people just sit in front of their Star Wars Episode X DVD and watch it over and over, waiting to be the first to discover a reference to the number 1138. (And if you don't know that phenomena, then have fun finding all of the effort dedicated to that little item...)

Which brings me to this, a sign way atop one of the giant bridges in Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas, which is in one of those hard-to-reach places but also one that the programmers knew people would try to navigate with the hope of finding something special. Classic programmer humor. Of course, there actually are tons of eggs in the game so it's almost taunting the player to search similar kinds of locations.

an end to the cynacism? not exactly

2006-06-29T13:37:00.000-07:00

Okay, just starting to realize that most of what I write on this thing has a really negative tone, and since I don't consider myself especially negative, that expressing some positives is a good idea. So now would be a good time to do that, related to the current conference.

It's been fabulous to connect with the old acquaintances I've met previously at this--and other related--conferences. I've had an excellent time discussing theory and practice, and learning more about what other research is going on in my interest space. So generally, the conference has been great! It's small enough so that you can interact with many people and actually do some professional socializing. That, along with a lot of good, interesting work, reinvigorates the intellectual engines and reminds me why I love my job and how great this field is.

So this would not be an end to the cheekiness, rather a brief holiday from the cynacism to remind myself that where I'm at and what I'm doing is really, really fun.

overheard at the conference...

2006-06-29T12:21:00.000-07:00

Statements people have heard me say here at the Int’l Conf. of the We’re into being Exclusivie Group (unofficial title, after learning that the flagship journal is NOT blind reviewed):

My submission was rejected like New Coke.
“Direct Manipulation Animation” is neither direct nor manipulation. Discuss.
(whispered to neighbor) How did this crap get past the review process?
Did you know you can just download learning? Just go to downloadlearning dot com. Huh, if I knew it was that simple I never would have gone to school. Just should’ve downloaded it.
I think my MacBook processor just lit my pants on fire.
I’m pretty sure that “accidental learning” doesn’t exist. And furthermore, just participating in an activity doesn’t mean you’re learning something either. I just participated in this conference session and I’m pretty sure after listening to these people that I’m dumber now than I was when the session began.

The best idea I’ve had at this conference had to do with scaling up of my research so that it can create impact at the system level. If I truly want something implemented, it’s clear how to make it work. “Look to the arches.” How did McDonalds get the McGriddle on the menu? Lots of PR and something that people liked. So if you’re trying to get something widely adopted, you have to have a lot of influence, access to a lot of resources (money, people and places). And most importantly, tasty meat surrounded by sugary goodness.

random thoughts extended

2006-06-18T23:05:00.000-07:00

At this conference, a reoccurring theme in nearly all sessions either dealt directly or around the push-pull issues of instructional design for educational games.

The attempts to reconcile the differences between designing educational games and the traditional models for designing instruction are daunting at the least, and extremely messy. One recent attempt was so convoluted and necessitated so many constraints for the game that the recommendations included aspects of AI, pedagogical agents, appropriate reflection, and of course had to be driven from highly organized and structured models. A fantastic attempt at “getting it all” without leaving out anything, but one wonders if any game could incorporate each of the issues, especially at a moderate or low-level of technical sophistication. The idea eschews a system that can be transferred across areas of content and instructional materials, it should be useful for many subjects with the same gameplay underneath.

This is in sharp contrast to my experience and ideas of others (an early session at the conference) who describe game activity as related to meaningful learning. In their session we started with a game that included bidding a number of beads to “win” the card. The players were asked to redesign the game to teach a number of different subjects, from Shakespeare to trigonometry. Our group was assigned “interpersonal relationships.” From what I could tell, all groups failed in their attempt to modify the current game in a way that could really produce complex learning. This seemed to confirm my expectation—learning activity needs to be aligned with instructional objectives.

In other words, you can’t just stick content into exiting game structures and expect the game to be fun, or have the same results as a game whose content was specifically designed for that activity. Learning games must be considered as contextual entities, especially from a design standpoint, if they are to truly be beneficial for complex thinking. This is a lesson we learned in learning sciences, moving away from traditional instructional design models and practices that did not allow for significant flexibility and modification in its procedures. It’s also a lesson they’re slowly learning in the design and development of learning objects. Packets of information created for use, reuse, and remixing need to be flexible enough to come in different sizes and cultures. In other words, to be effective the learning object must be adaptable and localizable to whatever context in which it will be used. Perhaps this is the lesson we should take for "reconciling" the push-pull of educational game design.

father's day nada fiction

2006-06-18T22:48:00.000-07:00

Every year we used to go to my grandparents’ ranch for Easter Sunday. The highlight of the day was the Easter egg hunt where the adults would fill multi-colored plastic eggs with jellybeans and foil-covered chocolate, then hide them around the yard. The ten or so of us grandchildren could hardly sit through brunch with the lure of the hunt awaiting us. Grandpa would sit back after his meal, look around the table at the kids, and say with a wink and a grin, “I think I heard the bunny out there,” and then we'd jump out of our seats and head for the door. Grandpa grew up homesteading in the hills of Western Montana, he lost two of his siblings to influenza in the 1920s, and never initiated hugs or kisses.

The year I turned six, I remember Grandpa taking me aside during the hunt and leading me around the barn to a thicket of grass, far away from the other kids and colored eggs. “I think I saw the bunny put one in there,” he said, pointing to an opening behind the downspout, where I could barely make out the narrow end of a lavender egg. It had a small pocketknife in it, with pearl inlay being held in place by the tiniest of screws. “That’s the knife my mother used cleaning fish for us when I was a boy. That knife helped get us through some terrible winters,” he said with a smile.

The next year, without a word from Grandpa, I snuck around the corner to the grassy area by the downspout and discovered the lavender egg. It held an old wristwatch that Grandpa bought when he visited San Francisco for the first time. The next year, I found a silver locket with a baby picture in it. Another year I found a few strange coins in the egg from a country I’d never heard of.

As the years went on, the gifts got stranger. Once he left me a small, lumpy chunk of metal that he found when planting his garden. One year the egg held an old dog collar, stained with dirt and blood. One of the last years the lavender egg held a bullet from WWII with a piece of paper and the word "SORRY" written on it. After Gram died, the grass around the barn turned to Russian thistles. That year's Easter, an old abandoned bird’s nest was stuffed in the downspout. The final year, the lavender egg was there, but it was crushed into small pieces and arranged into a neat pile. It was the last time we went to the ranch for Easter. Grandpa died a few months later.

random small thoughts on the day

2006-06-15T23:14:00.000-07:00

spongy
Originally uploaded by sheltonbrett.

I'm at a conference today that is focused on games and learning, and there's a whole lot of thoughts running through my head.

What's the deal with "incidental learning" or "accidential learning" as some people like to call it? Seems to be a favorite phrase of people here, as if hoping that spending thousands of hours playing online games have to produce meaningful learning. One gentleman had the onions to acutally admit that he learned some geography about the Carribbean Islands after playing "Pirates" for (literally) months. Huh? So what?! I still see no evidence of complex thought or learning of any significance that can be attributed to this phenomenon. So why keep using it as an excuse to shove it at schoolchildren when no actual value can be found?

On that note, someone did mention that if this "accident" happens to expose a student to new ideas or interests than they otherwise would not have known, then it's not necessarily a bad thing. Good point. But then it falls into a different category.

A colleague today at dinner was listening to one of my projects and actually sincerely told me my idea was "brilliant." I think that's a first one for me, no one has ever used that word with me before. But of course, I can't really believe it, unless I also believe all those people who tell me my stuff is crap.

Another woman asked a group of MMORG players/developers to help with an "anomoly in her data," as she described it. For some unknown reason to her, around 30% of the players in the MMORG she was studying would not admit that they were learning any real-world transferrable skills by participating in the game environment. No matter how much she pushed them, they insisted they were just playing a game. How rude, and truly unbelivable, she thought! Members of this group were quick to assure her that these gamers had a culture where they do not admit to participating in anything establishment, and certainly not anything educational. Either that, or they were simply not aware of the many transferable skills they were learning. Well, I suppose this could be true. But rather than assume a conclusion that the players were too stupid to realize the results of their own actions, or that they must be jaded youth who refuse to cow-tow to mom-and-dad's view of what's good for them, why don't we actually consider the possibility that THEY AREN"T LEARNING ANY TRANSFERRABLE SKILLS. To this group, that's apparently an unthinkable option. It was never brought up as a possibility. A nice example of losing all form of subjectivity when participating in, and taking stock in, the environment that you're studying.

Madison, Wisconsin is a beautiful place with great people. I keep wanting to make cheese jokes but dangit, everyone is so darn pleasant it's difficult to make fun. Plus, those folks at Playboy know what they're doing when they rate party schools. The nightlife in the middle of summer on a Thursday is better than any after-finals parties in Utah.

My presentation went very smooth, and I think might have some footing for a follow-up presentation next year if I want to come back. If tomorrow is as good as today, I think I probably will want to.

I need to buy one of those foam cheese hats. They cost $20 and I'd never wear it. But I gotta have one.

Oh by the way, the picture here is a familiar one-- my fave childhood toy Nerfman, but this version is surrounded by one of those horrendous "successories" kinds of formats. Want to mock these things by creating one of your own? Go to this site.

summer to-do list

2006-05-09T15:14:00.000-07:00

A friend was giving me a hard time yesterday about how when summer break begins that I'll have nothing to do. That's a thought...so, I better make out a work-related to-do list to see if he's right. This, of course, does not count refinishing the deck, yard work (planting bushes and trees, weeding, bringing in bark and spreading, installing drip lines, repairing and adjusting sprinklers, etc.), car maintenance, and those other domestic things that creep up when the weather gets warmer (anyone seen a wasp trap lately? I need one!).

No, this list is just about work-related things:

1. Finish and submit the absolute stickler of the paper from waaaaay back, dissertation days to the top-tier journal I've always dreamed about getting into (but likely will be hugely tough to do).

2. Write other committed-to journal articles that include 2 on PBL/instructional games, activity-goal alignment from design to development to implementation and results, and the analysis of motivation and gender with a look at classroom assessments and standards for instructional games. That's 4 that fit into this category.

3. Travel to and participate in 2 major conferences, and 1 minor conference. Plus help collaborators prepare for 2 other conference submissions.

4. Finish book chapter for forthcoming models and simulations book on educational gaming.

5. Help edit approximately 12 other chapters for same said book.

6. Re-formulate "presence and perspective" research project, and lead team to collect data, analyze, and wrap up for future article beyond this summer.

7. Write and help coordinate new grants (addressing 4 RFPs) that tackle different components of "educational games and simulations for people with disabilities" project. Approximate length of just the first one? 50 pages.

8. Create new class prep and revamp existing class for fall. The new class prep will involve a number of (new-to-me) important articles and careful thought.

9. Update my professional website to accurately reflect all information, including the new links to projects, research dissemination, and classes.

10. Teach intense 5-week summer class.

Yeah, looks like a nice, fun, relaxing summer.

savoir c'est survivre

2006-05-03T17:10:00.000-07:00

The title means, to know is to survive. I'm concentrating hard on surviving right now, at the end of a long semester and a day that started bad and went downhill from there. My primary frustration at this particular moment is the constant search for external funding.

An important part of my job (that I'm not very good at, but trying hard to improve) is to convince people that the work I do is interesting and important, innovative and makes an impact. And to do my work, I need to manage good people who may have a lot to learn but who also need to somehow live on what we can offer them. Some folks call this process of finding funding "schmoozing," I suppose, but I generally believe that if you have good ideas, and people are out there that want to give money to people to develop their good ideas, then it's just a matter of time and effort before they get together. So I search, research, inquire and wait. Search and wait. Search and wait.

A number of successful people in my area are convinced that it's a matter of time before I receive a windfall from *some source* to help develop my projects. But it's frustrating trying to move forward when no one appears to be buying what I'm selling. So Eddie Spaghetti, my friend, sing me some lyrics that can help me out, and talk to me about how we all feel like this sometimes.

http://www.supersuckers.com/

"Rock-N-Roll Records"

I've been workin like a mother just to get this fucker right
I got my ass down in the gutter tryin to irrigate this drought
Have no fear cuz now its here
rock and roll records ain't selling this year

I got my nuts against the grain and you know that it's a bitch
playin' through the pain and watching shit-bands get rich
it's been so clear to all my peers
that rock and roll records--they ain't selling this year

yeah it's a little bit of crummy how the music making money
seems to slip on through to a world full of dummys
I just get jeers for my blood sweat and tears
cuz rock and roll records ain't selling this year

I'm gonna spread it around, and get it all down
ain't gonna flip-flop, hip-hop, suckin on a pork chop
sounds so weird to my ears
that rock and roll records they ain't selling this year

Aow! Yeah, yeah yeah.

So at the end of the day I'm gonna do it my way
cuz I gotta have something good and fun to play
so raise you beer and let's say cheers
to rock and roll records that ain't selling this year

that's right, I'm here to testify on behalf of a rock and roll record

rock and roll records that ain't selling this year
aw, it's painfully clear
rock and roll records…

And just when I think I'm making progress...

2006-05-03T10:52:00.000-07:00

...I experience a horrible teaching moment. The story goes like this.

I'm reviewing the assignments in my undergrad class (only one I teach each year) when I notice one particular student's website is lacking many of the requirements of the assignment. Of particular notice is that none of her pages have the images linked properly and none are linked together. Well, I specifically remember going over this with her 2 weeks ago one-on-one and even did one of her links for her as an example. So I figure this is not her most recent version and email her asking her to come in and review it with me. (So, I'm feeling pretty good about what a great guy I am, how many instructors would take the time that I am with this poor girl? not many, I tell myself, giving her the opportunity to review and resubmit, etc.)

So when she comes in, I show her the website she turned in and asked about the images and links that are missing.
"Yeah, I don't know how to do that," she says.

"Well, do you remember us going over it in class, referring to the handout I gave to you, then our one-on-one session afterwards?"

"Yeah but I didn't learn it."

"Oh," I say, somewhat disappointed. "Well, why don't you take another crack at it and then I'll accept your revision."

"But we already have worked on other assignments since then, and I don't remember anything. And I can't learn from the handout," she replied.

"Well, this is a class that's designed to teach you skills to build a website, to add to your resume and hopefully use after the class is over. Are you saying that you didn't learn anything?"

"Yes, I didn't learn anything."

I thought about this for a minute and said, "Well, then the class let you down and I let you down."

She looked at me and said somewhat defensively, "Sorry," paused, then added, "So, what grade did I get?"

Sigh.

RCPM and Circus Mexicus

2006-04-20T09:32:00.000-07:00

Getting ready for the next trip to Puerto Penasco to see Roger Clyne and the Peacemakers in what we hope will remain an annual trip. Last time we went was Nov. '04, I believe, but really who can remember when it was, I just remember the good times and good friends that were there. Oh yes, and few stories that may or may not involve fighting a Mexican palm tree.

RCPM to me is really a band like no other, and whether it's right or not, I lump the Refreshments' music in there with them since they were the precursor to RCPM and still play many of their songs. Yes, people who know me associate 80's metal and hair bands with the majority of my tastes. But something about these guys just work with my system--perhaps it's part timing, part association, and part tradition, but probably a lot of really good music too.

I first started listening to the Refreshments when they played indoors and outdoors in downtown Tempe at Gibson's. A bit of a raw rock show, but something was definitely working about these guys live. Catchy tunes and very Arizona, is the only way to explain it. I bought my very own copy of Wheelie from the local Zia store and we played it constantly when we BBQ'd, pre-functioned, or whenever. Sometime thereafter they were signed by a big label and released Fizzy Fuzzy Big and Buzzy which to this day remains one of my favorite CDs. It was Wheelie cleaned-up a bit with a new song added and a few other minor changes. Once I moved away to Michigan, I still kept in touch with the band's live performances because they toured to Michigan (largely, I think, because guitarist Brian Blush was from there) and of course they still played locally in AZ. Annual trips to see friends Pat and Shannon would often coincide with a concert, lucky us.

After another great album (I don't mean to get into a discography here), the band breaks up, reforms as RCPM and I move to Seattle where I get to see them at the Tractor Tavern quite frequently. The only bad thing associated with this period is that someone broke into my house and stole all my CDs, alphabetically A through R. (The bag he stole from my closet could only carry so many.) So yes, my Supersuckers CDs survived but my most precious CD ever Wheelie was stolen. So someone out there has my Wheelie CD (you know who you are, the band autographed the insert and Roger wrote "Viva Brett" on it, and I want it back damnit) but fortunately I have a copy of the music that I made for backup (how often does that actually pay off? I can't believe that actually worked!) and I still listen to it religiously. But as you can tell, I'm still a bit bitter about it.

Now that I've settled in the gorgeous Rockies, I still see the band on tour but it's the trips to AZ and Mexico with friends that I look most forward to, along with the new releases and (thankfully) frequent music the band makes on its independent label. Let me tell you, if you don't have a copy of Americano! then you need to get it, and if you don't like it then I don't want to talk to you, because frankly, we woudn't get along anyway. It's that good. I recently purchased the Four Unlike Before from iTunes and today I'm completing ripping my Roger CDs to my iPod so from now on until until Rocky Point '06, it's all about the music.

http://www.azpeacemakers.com/

Why educational technology?

2006-03-25T21:46:00.000-08:00

The following is the beginning to a short essay that I wrote about my interests in the field and why I'm interested in pursueing research in this area.

One of the characteristics that keeps me enthusiastic about the study of educational technology is its cross-disciplinary nature. Scholars with backgrounds ranging from engineering, math and science to those from language, composition and art all merge within this line of inquiry to study what happens when technology is merged with instruction. Educational technologists are concerned with topics that may range in focus and audience, but we all share concern with the impact of technology in today’s learning environments. My niche within this discipline originates from my days as an engineer when I created scientific visualizations to transform complex information in ways to make it more easily understandable to everyday audiences. Now as a fledgling scholar myself, I have tried to merge my research interests with the activities and pursuits that are grounded within traditional educational technology and that have strong ties to learning sciences.

My interests can be described in two broad areas that have overlap in technical theme and share many theoretical perspectives.

The first area of research interest is the localizing and contextualizing of educational resources, in relationship to their availability and use. I have experienced some early success in obtaining funding and piloting research in this area, and want to continue my work as the world “flattens” in culture and understanding. The three specific threads of research within this category that interest me are the cultural interpretation of graphic symbols, instructional games and simulations, and modes of accessibility and universal design. This final thread covers issues of computer security and Internet safety. I am the co-principal investigator of a grant analyzing security issues in my home state.

The second area of research interest is most accurately described as the innovation of technology, and the role technology plays in mediating the understanding of complex concepts and phenomena. This category includes the investigation of how meaning is negotiated between people and technology-based artifacts, and the environments that support this negotiation. The three main threads of my research interest within this category include augmented reality, computer games, and instructional simulations. The roots of my approach relate directly to learning sciences in the way that “complex systems” might describe the interplay between learner and artifact, novice-and-expert, and the evolving understandings of how we understand the environment around us through the interpretation of our experiences. From my early empirical work and investigation of existing literature, it appears that the way students experience new phenomena as mediated through many different kinds of technological interfaces can change the way they develop their understanding of complex issues. I am not interested in revisiting the “media versus methods” debate, but rather building on an approach that accepts that learning is mediated by experiences that include more than the delivery medium itself. This is a perspective that I’m working from, but further exploration of this approach needs to be unpacked and considered while I investigate practice that can inform theory.

At Thirty-Five

2006-03-12T07:54:00.000-08:00

Three score and ten, the psalmist saith,
And half my course is well-nigh run;
I've had my flout at dusty death,
I've had my whack of feast and fun.
I've mocked at those who prate and preach;
I've laughed with any man alive;
But now with sobered heart I reach
The Great Divide of Thirty-five.

And looking back I must confess
I've little cause to feel elate.
I've played the mummer more or less;
I fumbled fortune, flouted fate.
I've vastly dreamed and little done;
I've idly watched my brothers strive:
Oh, I have loitered in the sun
By primrose paths to Thirty-five!

And those who matched me in the race,
Well, some are out and trampled down;
The others jog with sober pace;
Yet one wins delicate renown.
O midnight feast and famished dawn!
O gay, hard life, with hope alive!
O golden youth, forever gone,
How sweet you seem at Thirty-five!

Each of our lives is just a book
As absolute as Holy Writ;
We humbly read, and may not look
Ahead, nor change one word of it.
And here are joys and here are pains;
And here we fail and here we thrive;
O wondrous volume! what remains
When we reach chapter Thirty-five?

The very best, I dare to hope,
Ere Fate writes Finis to the tome;
A wiser head, a wider scope,
And for the gipsy heart, a home;
A songful home, with loved ones near,
With joy, with sunshine all alive:
Watch me grow younger every year --
Old Age! thy name is Thirty-five!


-Robert W. Service

jonas and murdock

2006-03-04T10:17:00.000-08:00

It's so cliche to blog about your pets that it's almost sickening. I mean, blogs are an exercise in narcissism anyway, but who cares about what pets you have? It's so ridiculous.

So here are my cats, Jonas and Murdock.

They are best buddies and about as opposite as two cats can be. Murdock is two weeks older than Jonas. He's a tall, lanky cat with huge hops and a verbose meow, especially when it gets close to kittymilk treat time. He's the all-black cat that I've always wanted, has funny cat-fangs, and will push you away when you pick him up but be mad when you put him back down. He's the smart one and instigates most of the trouble that they two get into.

Jonas is the first long-haired cat I've ever had and he's the sweetest feline I've ever known. We got him when he weighed all of 6 oz. from animal rescue. He was found abandoned and ears full of mites, plus a very serious respiratory infection. The first 3 weeks he would constantly sneeze, so much so that his nose would bleed (yeah, that was pretty messy). We had to force antibiotics down his throat for the first 3-4 months and were not sure if he was going to make it. Now at well over 20 pounds, he's got a loud purr, loves people and is the one whose curiosity is always getting him in trouble.

Those are my boys.

the permanency of it all

2006-03-04T10:02:00.000-08:00

So, one of the things that's tough about email is the fact that there's no "undo" on it. You send that sucker and it's out there. I think almost everyone has a story of an email that they didn't mean to send and pressed that button and there you go, it's out there and there's no bringing it back. Ever write an email about someone and then accidently send it to the very person you were ragging on? Well, I haven't done that one but I've heard some horror stories. There's a similar issue with blogging. I've written some stuff only to read it the next day and take it back down. Perhaps that's the wrong thing to do, and blogs should be the place that you refrain from self-editing, I dunno.

Blogs also have that drawback of projecting what you want people to see, which is different than they are. If you blog something off-the-cuff and people read it, there's no controlling what impression they take of you and what you think. The same way you can project something you're not, is the same way the reader can take or leave what they want. It can be intentional or unintentional, but I'm guessing that often it's more the latter than the former. You can read a person's blog and think you're getting to know them, but are you really? Sometimes it's hard to remember that you're not. But what brought all this on was that I sent an email last night (about a blog, actually) and I'm regretting it's permanency. I need that undo button.

Delara's thoughts on Crash

2006-02-23T11:14:00.000-08:00

So, this isn't really a new post, but a friend recently saw Crash for the first time and so I revisited what Delara posted about it. There was a lot of interesting responses to her post, the most boring of which was mine:

You know, I've actually thought about this a bit based on what Don Cheadle's character said, and this is a regional thing (cultural influences interlaced throughout, for sure) as much as anything else. I grew up in the western U.S., and the attitude here is most definitely, "I need my personal space," which may or may not have something to do with originating from that whole pioneer cowboy thing. But space is something that is important to me, and when other people invade that space it goes beyond uncomfortable, it's assaulting. It makes me mad. And I consider myself a friendly people-person, this is something different. People have different personal boundaries in verbal exchanges that I associate with different regions too, and since I travel a bit (as do you, D :) ) this manifests itself all over the place. When I lived in the midwest, I often felt affronted the way people approached me. NY? Forgeddaboutit. In an informal unscientific poll, the other westerners who work with me also perceive this difference. So I was thinking the opposite of what Don Cheadle's character was, that this invasion of space was the root of the problem, rather than the lack of shared space. I know this wasn't the point of your post, btw, but thanks for getting me thinking anyway.

Curious if anyone else has had similar experiences to mine, or if they agree with the thought that Don's character expresses: avoiding each other leads to confrontation.

February 14, nada fiction

2006-02-14T21:39:00.000-08:00

February 14, 1996

A lone candle flickered on the glass dining table. Shadows of the chairs danced on the mauve walls in the corner of the room. The candle provided the only light on this evening, it completely overpowered anything external, or internal, as his heart was as dark as tar. Not evil, just without any hope. He stared at the candle, its luminescence zigging and zagging around the wick, smoke making chaotic patterns into invisible space and beyond. He breathed deeply. Strawberry, and just a little bit of wax. Not like real strawberries , more like those fake strawberries that you recognize from card shops and trailer homes. He could hear the candle burning, actually hear it. A slight sizzle, sort of an airy wisp like a faint wind outside of a car window.

She called our relationship the essence of blissfulness, the core of ignorance.

The salisbury steak was history, and so were the potato buds and carrots that were crunchy (but were supposed to be soft). Beef gravy swirled the empty plate, cradling a fork, and a knife was perched on the edge. A tablecloth and a wadded paper napkin next to the lone brass candleholder completed the arrangement. He squinted beyond the candle into what is usually the family room, but the darkness enveloped everything but his dinner-setting. For all he knew, the other rooms had evaporated into nothingness like the smoke from the flame.

We ate calamari and drank two bottles of expensive wine, last year.

He pushed his plate back, toward the scented candle, and laid his forehead in his hands. He rubbed his scalp with his fingertips, massaged his temples, and unconsciously uncrossed his legs beneath the table to relieve the mounting pressure on his tingling thigh. What the hell? It's just another day, just another dinner. If there was one thing that he simply hated, just couldn't allow for himself, it was pity. Pity is for losers, for the weak-minded, for the people who were unlike him. There was no way that anyone could have the power to have that kind of effect on him.

Could they?

He was the one in control of the situation. He called the shots. He was the one who made others wonder what they did wrong, limp in their own sorrow. He created the unhappiness and dispensed it upon others. He was the doer, not the doee. It had always been that way. He did his own thing, made the decisions, and it was the others that would have to deal with them.

He had never been as uncomfortable as he was right then. He had the look and feel of bewildered freshness, like a baby recognizing his mother for the first time. Is that what this was? Is this the way he made countless others feel, when he let them know they were nothing to him? Meaningless? Meaningless.

He spasmed into a state of alertness. Looking around, he saw the familiar surroundings of his bedroom. He had jerked upright with a start, slowly succumbing to the reality of his environment. But before his mind pushed the brutal thoughts, memories, out of existence, he gazed to the other side of the mattress, toward where the love of his life slept. It was empty. Vacant, just like the past two months, three weeks, and four days. Happy Valentine's Day.

Chapeau Sonata

2006-02-14T21:24:00.000-08:00

madness to heart words
of things we hate in themselves
a verse about hats

Thanks, Katy! (You rock.)

Good reviews

2006-02-08T10:17:00.000-08:00

Well, there's good reviews and bad reviews. The folks in my business normally get some of both. We are charged often with having to write our own reviews, and I find it's always much easier to find things I don't like in a proposal than things that I do like. The important thing for me to remember is that for every negative comment I make, to partner it with constructive suggestions on how to improve it. Even if I don't necessarily agree with the idea behind the proposal, I try to help the author with suggestions.

So, we in this business need to have thick skins. I personally like to keep a record of some of the more horrible rejections I get, something suggested to me at an early stage of my studies. I recently received reviews from 2 people that were deciding whether or not my research idea was worth funding or not. The idea behind the proposal:

To gather data about computer security and Internet safety in the public schools of this state (i.e., determine "what's going on" in terms of policy, practice, and responsibility) and to create an action plan for developing education, if needed, based on the analysis.

Here are some excerpts from Reviewer 1:

Determining the potential for attracting additional funding relies on the quality of the proposal and a clear description of why additional funding would be needed. Indeed all four evaluation criteria rely on proposal quality.

This proposal is poorly written.

What is the difference between a data synthesis and findings?

The literature review provides no convincing evidence that the proposed project is needed. No literature is cited. Referencing web addresses give the reader very little information about the reference.

Aren't computer security issues part of a computer specialists training? I surely hope so.

On page 5 quantitative and qualitative analysis of the data is proposed. However, data analysis is never described in the proposal.

The writing on page 4, is particularly vague, e.g., do you collect a "data analysis?"
In general the proposal seriously needs editing.

There probably is a need for including computer security issues in teacher education, but that need is not convincingly established in this proposal. And, I wonder why it isn't included in the (sic) class for preservice teachers?

And some excerpts from Reviewer 2:

This proposal is so poorly prepared that there is little reason for optimism about future extramural funding.

Now, with the unverified assumption that needs do exist (see, e.g., pp. 7, 8), there is no provision for the contingency that the survey data would indicate that there is no need or a more limited need than envisioned in the proposal.

The list of procedures on page 4 is full of vagueness. In short, the description of methodology is wholly inadequate.

Even if the research element of the proposal were adequate, it is doubtful that NSF would fund a request for funding to build a course for teacher education (the reference to a curriculum in the proposal is never elaborated on, but a place for a new curriculum in teacher education seems unlikely) and for the training of school
administrators in computer safety. The reach of the project would be too narrow, both in terms of technological impact on education and the scope of any research.

Given the condition of the proposal noted above, it is difficult to anticipate any benefit to (sic) this state's citizens from such a… grant. There is a brief discussion of potential impact on page 10, but it is at such a general level that it adds no credibility to the likelihood of benefit.

---

So, you don't get to choose who reviews your proposal. If I could, I would choose someone who knows the difference between "data synthesis" and "findings." I would choose someone who would not complain about not seeing the "need" for this funding yet at the same time will assume that it's important enough that it's already being taught. (It isn't.) And I would choose someone who wouldn't complain of vagueness and at the same time, write a sentence like:

Now, with the unverified assumption that needs do exist (see, e.g., pp. 7, 8), there is no provision for the contingency that the survey data would indicate that there is no need or a more limited need than envisioned in the proposal.

Clear as a bell, right?

The bottom line, stated clearly in the proposal, is that computer security in our state's schools isn't being taught in a uniform, successful fashion. It is important to research what is going on. And that's why you're reading the grant proposal.

I really could react to each and every comment of the two reviewers and make this really long and drawn-out, but why? It almost speaks louder if I don't react at all. I'll just file these reviews with my other rejection letters, always good for a laugh as well as a little sip of humility.

that which is not supposed to be

2006-02-08T10:06:00.000-08:00

PHOENIX (AP) -- In the NBA, one man's blocked shot can be another man's goaltending.

Such was the case when Kevin Garnett blocked Shawn Marion's short jumper at the buzzer to preserve the Minnesota Timberwolves' 103-101 victory over the Phoenix Suns on Monday night.

"That was a good block," Garnett told reporters. "I mean, you all saw what you saw, but as soon as it left his hand I got it, you know. I'm sitting right here in front of you all with a win."

The Suns complained vehemently that it was goaltending, but to no avail, and Minnesota had its first victory in five tries against Phoenix.

"I feel like the Seattle Seahawks," said Steve Nash, referring to what the Seahawks felt were bad calls by officials in Sunday's Super Bowl. "It's remarkable. There's like five games this year where we've not gotten a call in the last 30 seconds. After awhile, you realize you don't get those games back, and it's tough to take."

----

I could have, of course, pulled any number of comments from reports how Ben says he didn't get into the end zone, how the "experts" believe the officiating of SuperBowl XL was terribly one-sided, and how the Seahawks were robbed of any chance of competing in the game due to the officiating of the game. But the Nash quote brings to mind how the vernacular of unfortunate events can get ingrained into common speech. "Don't leave me Monsoned out here all alone," or "I got really Mollered last night," or "I was really sick but I never Miltoned, so it wasn't that bad." Unfortunately, we can now add getting "Seahawked" to the list.

I haven't read one full article about the game, haven't watched one post-game show, opened one sports page of a newspaper, or one wrap-up or any Sportcenters since the game. And I won't, either. (The Nash article was sent to me, and Google desktop keeps flashing headlines, which is how I know what the talk has been about.) If I even think about the game I just get upset, feel like punching something in the face (what stage of grief is that?), and frankly I don't have time to spend the mental energy worrying about it. As far as I'm concerned, the final score of that game was Pittsburgh 0, Seattle 0, NFL -35. And no one will be able to convince me otherwise.

RIP-ping on what Instructional Games are

2006-01-28T09:34:00.000-08:00

In the study of digital game-based learning, and the games themselves, is the ever-popular topic that rages on: what is a game? Plenty before me have echoed my thoughts about why this question shouldn't be our focus, rather that we should be looking at more important questions. Questions like: what are kids learning with computer games? What are the implications of what kids are learning? Is any meaningful or complex learning coming out of our efforts of design and development of these games?

The question always comes up, however, because by defining what you mean by "game" helps shape the taxonomy of computer games, so that we're not talking about two completely different things when it comes to games research, and we consequently resist making poor generalizations about games and learning, and ruther resist making assumptions about games that belong within contextualized discussions.

So, what the heck am I talking about? Wiley's blog on the reporting the death of learning objects (or rather, if we should even be concerned with a death or not) got me thinking about what we in games research should really be concerned with. And in the same way he talks about the focus of "localizing" resources for education is the same way we should be concerned with the contextualizing of computer game play. Generally speaking, that learning how to run a town in a Sims environment might be completely different if couched as part of a learning exercise than it would be on a Friday night, munching Cheetos, and trying to score with a Sim person of a different computer gender than yourself. Just like with other educational resources (materials), the context in which it's used and the supporting educational components really define what the educational computer game is. Is the instructional game we built motivating to play? Is it challenging? Cover interesting characters and environments? Appeal to my sense of accomplishment? Is it interactive with ntelligent players or NPCs? Well it depends.

But all of these questions lead to the same educational question: is playing this game worthwhile? I don't think you can answer that question without being able to accurately interpret the nature of the game in its full, specific context, which is particularly relevant to the discussion of learning objects. Showing that students learned about "something" in "this" situation with "these" people present and with "this" kind of instructional elements as support is pretty much what we can do right now. And I don't mean that as a discouraging kind of claim, rather, that there's much to learn about how context influences the way people learn, eventually leading to recommendations on how we can maximize our potential, and the potential we build into our instructional resources.

So in the same way Wiley chooses to let the debate rage of whether something is truly useful or not, I'll take a similar stance that I don't necessarily mind that people will continue to debate whether something is an instructional game, or has game-like attributes but is really a simulation, or an activity, or whatever. I'll just concentrate on what it is that people did and how they used it, what impact was made as a result and how the implications have meaning across multiple contexts. Now, if I can only convince the folks at NSF that it's worth a CAREER grant to come up with the same conclusion...

Our hockey team logo

2006-01-16T12:37:00.000-08:00

I made this logo in the tradition of the Calgary Flames using Illustrator. We're getting new jerseys and may put it on the front.

Seahawks win their playoff game

2006-01-16T12:29:00.000-08:00

So, the long-suffering Seahawks fans like myself finally get a playoff win and it just feels great. I was at their last playoff win at home, back in 1984 against the Raiders (then a division rival). Ghostbusters was all the rage, and accordingly, the knockoff T-shirts quickly followed. I bought this one and wore it to the game, a 13-7 win for the 'Hawks.

I gave the shirt to my good friend Rob who took this picture at yesterday's game and sent it to me over his phone. The shirt came full circle, from win to win, and it only took 20 years! Makes me feel like a little part of me was at the game, too. Let's hear it for the Raiderbusters, in a huge win over the Redskins. It was a long time coming!

the problem with cheese dust

2005-12-28T07:29:00.000-08:00

During this holiday season, I'm reminded of a harrowing story involving cheese dust. That's right, harrowing. I'll make the connection to the holidays after I first tell the story.

It was sometime around 1995 when we were driving from Laughlin, NV (yes, the same Laughlin featured almost every week in episodes of Unsolved Mysteries) to Tempe, AZ after a very tiring night of mediocre blackjack and trying to keep friend Pat from riding display models of jetskis on the elevated stages between banks of slot machines. (Let's just say Pat was having a worse night financially than me, but perhaps a better time with the complimentary beverages.) Anyway, neither of us got a great deal of sleep that night, both of us were sleepy and hungry, so what's better to munch on the way home than some delicious Flamin' Hot Cheetos? "Nothin'" would be the correct answer.

So as I'm lazily eating this scrumptious snack, I was also licking my fingers of the red cheese dust in an ordinary attempt to keep things tidy, and to not over-cheese my fingers between handfuls. Mind you, this was an acceptable technique because we were not sharing the bag (Pat doesn't enjoy the spicy things, he will start to sweat and get uncomfortable, as he's been known to do with chicken wings in the Arizona area) and the bag was a 99 cent, single person size.

The information I didn't know, which would lead to my demise, was that cleaning the fingers of the Flamin' Hot dust--while effectively removing the actual tiny pieces of cheesy substance--does not completely remove whatever spice it is that makes the cheetos so darn flamin' hot. Sort of like when you decide to remove the seeds of jalapenos by scraping your fingers through a split one. You might as well just stick red hot pokers under your fingernails, and there's NO RELIEF by the way, I'll make that mistake, oh, I'm thinking only one time ever. I digress once again. So we're riding back to Tempe in the car when I find the need to vigorously rub my tired eyes with supposedly clean hands, albeit stained red with licked cheese dust. That's when the burning set in. Not just a little burning, but full-on pepper-spray to the face like I was a trailer park victim of a Cops episode. Oh, the agony! Tears streaming down my face, no water in sight to splash in my eyes, hands rendered useless by (again) the aforementioned cheese residue, and no where even to run to expel the pain. So I had to sit in the seat and scream for any source of relief, as we passed cars on the highway. Through a tear-shrouded veil I distinctly remember passing another car and seeing the frightened faces of two kids who were staring at me: my head out the window, holding red-stained hands in the air like I was scrubbed for surgery, screaming at them and crying out the window, "My eyes! My eyes!"

At the very least, I'm ready to support putting warning labels on those bags that inform the snacker of the dangers involved in touching one's eyes when eating the snack.

So, not to give the wrong impression, I'm definitely "pro" cheese dust. I love that stuff as much as the next guy, especially the Cooler Ranch dust from Doritos. Although certain rules must be followed when addressing the cheese dust, such as not using the licking method to clean the dust, then diving right back into a community bag. The same as the "double-dip" violation so eloquently portrayed in an episode of Seinfeld when George takes a bite of a chip then puts it back into the community bowl of dip. "It's like putting your whole mouth into the bowl." Licking your fingers then going back in the bag for more is like putting your whole mouth into the bag.

So, how does one clean the hands of cheese dust at a party? What is the proper etiquette? We know that a dry rub on a napkin simply does not satisfy. What about when you're snacking and working? You certainly can't have the cheese dust getting all over your keyboard as you blog. You can't use a pen or pencil, either, as the dust migrates to other things you're working with, whether it's paper, photos, or (ahem) student essays they've turned in. Something must be done to help.

So this brings me full circle to the idea I have for the holidays, and I'm seriously considering calling-up Ronco for this idea: the Cheese Dust Remover. Okay, the title needs work. But the idea is that there's a little vacuum-like system to safely remove the dust from your fingers after inserting the snack into your mouth, without having to lick them when it's not proper (or safe) to do so. Imagine sitting at your laptop, reaching for a Nacho Cheesier, putting it into your mouth, dabbing your fingers on the patented CheeDeeRem effectively removing any remaining substances, then going right to your keyboard without fear of having any snack remnant fall into your computer. It's a million dollar idea. Now, I haven't exactly figured out how the CheeDeeRem works, if it will actually suck the dust off or if it works like a Swiffer type system using positively-charged wipes to pick up negatively charged pieces of cheese product. I dunno. But I think something like that should work pretty well. So next time you're at a party (think Super Bowl or something) and you see a big bowl of chips with some sort of dusty flavoring, think about how handy a little CheeDeeRem square off to the side of the bowl would be. Then contact me with a check for investment money.

By the way, you can buy some cheese dust to sprinkle on your own foods, but I don't know if it's as good as what Frito-Lay manufactures. It looks more like the cheese in the packets of cheap macaroni-and-cheese boxes. I also ran across this article that describes some brown cheese dust as possibly being due to cheese mites, the "brown" being a combination of alive and dead mites and their excrement. Uhhhhh. That's just nasty.

What Pre-1985 Video Game Character Am I?

2005-11-09T07:42:00.000-08:00

I am a Pacman Ghost.

I like to hang around with friends, chatting, dancing, all that sort of thing. We don't appreciate outsiders, and do our best to discourage others approaching us. I enjoy occasionally wandering around randomly, and often find that when I do so, I get to where I wanted to be. What Video Game Character Are You?

hockey update

2005-11-08T02:18:00.000-08:00

Yeah, that goal and assist were flukes. In the last 2 games, exactly zero goals and zero assists. No one is calling me "pie chart." Still having fun, though.

my first hockey goal

2005-10-26T23:51:00.000-07:00

Not a giant proclamation or anything, but I have to announce that I scored my very first hockey goal the other night (in competitive play). Get ready to be bored with a play-by-play of a men's no-checking-league hockey highlight:

It was a rebound goal. I was at the edge when I saw the puck come toward me from in back of the net. I threw my blade at it a few times in quick succession, and sure enough, I got it over the goalie pad which was late in getting over. So.... I stood there. No real celebration, no huge horn sounded or anythingl. I skated to the bench among some congratulations (thanks, Ian, youdaman) and just felt glad to be part of a good thing. So, the thing is that I fully expect that this goal to be the last of the athletic-related feats I'm going to accomplish. I'm getting old, and this is likely the final sport that I'll try competitively. But I'm very happy that I scored, it was quite a thrill, as I got hooked on hockey when I lived in Phoenix and especially when I moved to Detroit. BTW, I kept the scoring streak alive with a nice assist the next game: I took it away from a defenseman the first period and sent one toward the net, and Greg was there to tip it up and over the goalie pad to score. (Yea, Greg!) It was a score to knot the game at 2-2 in the first. We went on to finish 7-2 so the other team was pretty chapped by the end and it got a little chippy (they have a guy named something really cool, some say it's an amalgamation of his last name "pichar" but it sounds like "pie chart" and I really want that to be my nickname since I hate those things so much and I teach data vis. ... anyway)... Assisting a goal is as much or more thrilling than scoring for yourself, maybe because setting someone else up is harder than actually scoring. I don't know, but the assist was just as sweet. It's a great game... I just hope to keep improving the longer I play.

a little more on activity-goal alignment for instructional games

2005-10-26T23:18:00.000-07:00

Here, I relate about some of the ideas about "activity-goal alignment" theory for desiging instructional games. which I've tried to implement in my class of instructional games (and the CLE lab):

This is an effort of teaching New Media educational strategies to instructional technologists through interactive fiction. The Instructional Games class I teach is composed of graduate students in Instructional Technology. The students explore the field of instructional gaming through a survey of readings, existing products, and those in development. The class considers:

What is the emerging nature of this field?
What are the elements of an effective game?
What makes for “good” instructional design within a gaming environment?

A large emphasis of the class is in the examination of current research. In-class activity centers on readings and class discussion. Out-of-class activity includes exposure and the playing of games, and the creation of students’ own game design.

The students become teachers of new media. This class is unique in many ways, the most prominent is that I'm teaching students how to create new media resources for education, so at the same time, they need to think like teachers that use new media text in their classes. As Gee noted, “When people learn to play video games, they are learning a new literacy” (2003, p. 16). It is most common for instructional technologists to become mini-content experts in the areas of curriculum they are designing, however, what is new is that they must develop a critical sense of what makes for “good” games, read the game so as to formulate learning objectives that are parallel (or integrated) into the goals of the game, and create instructional products within the constraints of the planned educational environment.

I have them read a lot. A list of research and readings attempts to span the spectrum of learning theory, game theory, and instructional game research that includes Aldrich, Crawford, Gee, Wolf, Kirriemuir, Koster, Miller, Squire and many others (a full list is available at http://it.usu.edu:16080/~bshelton/courses/instgames/ ).

The Case for the Class: Designing and Creating Interactive Fiction
One of the major assignments for this class is the design and partial creation of an instructional game based on Edgar Lee Masters’ work Spoon River Anthology using the medium of interactive fiction (IF). My students experience the medium of IF through play and critical analysis (Zork, Montfort and Granade works, among others) then dive into an unfamiliar computer language in order to transform a classic text into something new. They transform SRA into a new media text aimed at 9th grade English students (and teachers) who may experience and analyze the piece in ways expected (reading comprehension, poetry, literary devices) and unexpected (computer language, confidence and self-esteem, problem solving).

The (constraint?) process I have them follow for design/development is one of activity-goal alignment, meaning that they must design the game-like activity so that it integrates the instructional goals of the product. How do they do that? Well, it's a challenge. But the point of it is that they can't simply insert game-elements (presumably to increase motivation to play, as that's what game-like elements do) just for the sake of increasing the engagement of the game. Eventually, these game-like elements will distract from the learning. At the same time, they can't simply insert instuctional techniques (for instance, a "reflection" activity) without having it be involved with the game activity. This will keep it from being boring and create those cognitive "shocks" that take someone out of "flow" like states of activity. With this premise as a guide, they must design and develop with the game activity aligned with the instructional goals in order to make a successful educational game.

The students will eventually implement a New Media pedagogy in instructional Technology.
Specifically, I'm teaching a class on how to theorize about and design/create instructional games, with the class project aimed at designing a work of IF to teach a classic book for use in high school English classrooms. How do instructional technology designers need to become mini-experts in various subjects, and share successes and pitfalls of the students in my class? Something to consider. Portions of the game they develop will be available to be shared, I'll make sure that gets posted when it's ready.

interactive fiction as a text book

2005-10-26T22:35:00.000-07:00

So, these posts have to be getting boring. "Too academic, not enough laughs." Yeah, well who asked ya? Just kidding, but lately stuff's in my head that is academic so that's what I must blog.

So I had this idea, based on the project I've initiated with my Instructional Games class, about taking Interactive Fiction (IF) to other domains. I mean, I know other people have taken IF to all other areas, so no big whoop. I'm not the inventor here. But I mention to my partner-in-crime David Wiley about my idea of using IF for a textbook for a class, and he thinks he already invented it. Whatever, doooode.

Anyway, wouldn't it be crazy to have students enter a domain and walk around exploring things, alluvasudden, an NPC of David Merrill comes out and starts talking about the first principles of instructional design. Well, wouldn't that be cool? You're typing text to speak to him: he's telling you about pebbles in ponds. Fantastic! How about if you get two or more of them into he same space and have them speak to each other. This is perhaps the most important benefit of MOOs and MUDs, I think. You get people in these things that can interact with you, have conversations with you, and you begin to scratch the surface of the persona....

Well, perhaps David and I can pull off this project with some funding. We have the basis for IF from my project in the Instructional Games class I'm teaching. Dr. Wiley is innovative as hell (yeah, I said it) in making an online book that contains a whole bunch of characters (all eventually, written by himself) discussing the issues at hand for his class. This is going to be a great book (also a TEXTBOOK) to read, and you can count me in on the readership. Anyway, I don't know if people will respond to it like I have, but in the same spirit, the IF textbook should have the same kind of impact. Imagine, interacting with content and characters as the book author intended, yet having some feeling of narrative, story and autonomy as you move through chapters. Interact with characters from the past, present, and fictional in the same space. Survey an entire fields (Instuctional Technology) by typing commands to "go north", "turn on lamp" and "kill Wiley with knife." Cool stuff.

Learning, Complexity, and Simplicity (II)

2005-10-12T06:16:00.000-07:00

See, there's this heater between our offices that lets communication pass through the vents, so I hear his Barry Manilo and he hears my Supersuckers, but the conversation normally never gets this far, which is why we must blog. Gotta blog, people. Dr. Wiley reflects on many things here, including why "learning" playing Sims 4 may be valuable, but let's just say that I stub my toe quite often and don't like it. Does that mean I've learned to stop stubbing my toe? Show me the learning.

Okay, let's start a little earlier. David writes that the order in which things happen make all the difference, in terms of "stimulus-response" vs. "probe-gather data," and that humans work in both modalities. His perspective is that we are "learning agents with goals and purposes" who are able to grab control of this experimental mechanism to meet certain circumstances. I think based on purposeful action and motivation certainly it seems that both happen, but that's where the "cyclical" part comes in. I think that where ever the cycle "begins" it doesn't really matter (tomato-tomahto), these perception-repsonse cycles happen extremely quickly. If David wants to argue that purposeful, meaningful action always begins at the "probe environment" level then that, to me, is an argument that dodges the idea of making complex connections about our world. Again, the stimulus-response mechanism is for dealing with our immediate environment, and no doubt it plays a role in our understanding of complex concepts. However, because it's a cycle, it's less useful to argue when we enter/exit that cycle but rather how what new experiences we have mesh with our previous understandings.

Dave goes on:

To stand on a soapbox I have almost broken with use, effective instructional design is a radically interdisciplinary undertaking. “Message design” is Brett’s term, not mine, but to work with it I would say that a more sophisticated understanding of message design would include considerations like the sociocultural context in which the messages are being sent / received, the mode of their communication, and the artifacts in which they may be reified.

Actually, message design is not my term at all, but one that has a long history of studying how we make meaning from our world, covering areas from semiotics and cogntive science to learning and instructional design. I think message design experts do attempt to take into account sociocultural context, and is very much an interdisciplinary pursuit. I was merely attempting to delineate what level of importance David was making in studying the "messages" being passed back and forth between learner and her environment, and the role of instructor/designer. I was arguing that the role is much larger than carefully formulating "messages" themselves, so now it feels as if he is backing off of his original idea. Or, there are two more possibilities--either I'm not getting his point or we actually agree (land-sakes! there's oil in them fields!).

So here is the crux of the conversation, I think. David then goes on to disagree with me somewhat on the value of "learning" with something like Sim City. He says that managing individual components of a game, like zoning, parks, taxes, civic infrastructure, are somewhat simple but that the complexity lies in the interactions of these components. Understanding collective patterns from these components is difficult.

Yes, the learning is definitely secondary. Should we devalue it because it is secondary? Do we look down on the amazing learning of history and culture one gains by becoming proficient in games like Civilization III? Who would you rather have for the Mayor of your town - someone with a degree in management or someone who has mastered Sim City?

Interesting how the word "secondary" made David feel as if I were writing about the value, or lack thereof, of interacting with a sophistocated system (yes, I think Sims is somewhat sophistocated). Secondary, in this case I meant "unintended" rather than "less valuable." { This is great, I'm the guy who teaches instructional simulations and games and now I have friends arguing to me about how valuable they are. It's almost like when I told Dr. Wiley that the faculty is the department. ;) }

But this is the interesting assertion that parents and scholars alike seem to conclude, and David is certainly not the only one. Do kids have "amazing learning" about history and culture from their gaming experiences? Not that I can tell from nearly all of the literature (check out DeJong and Jooligen's piece on scientific discovery learning, for example). But you say, "But I can see it! I can see the learning!" Well, show me the learning. Show me that a Sims expert makes a better mayoral candidate than a business graduate. Show me that because I can do an activity, and be successful at achieving the ends of that activity, means that I've learned something valuable, complex, important and applicable.

Was that activity a designed learned activity meant to teach me something meaningful? Great! Still, prove to me I learned. Well, you say, I can do that any number of ways, most of which include an assessment exercise. Okay, I'll buy that. But now prove to me that I learned something meaningful from a game, designed to be a game. Oh, but that's not what you mean, this "other" learning from my activity is also valuable, things like social skills or confidence. Well that's okay too, I'm just saying that let's say what those games are good for, and stop assuming that anyone who runs a Sims town is ready for public office.

But wait, let's assume that David's right, and that kids learn about culture and history from Civilization III. It's then my assertion that they learned these things from game-based activities that were closely aligned with learning objectives teaching culture and history. Could these learning objectives be implicit rather than explicit? Highly possible. Did it feel like a learning objective was being met during game play? Probably not. But I would argue that it was there, even if it was integrated seemlessly into game-like features of the player's activity. And really, that's my whole argument for intructional game design. If it's designed properly, then perhaps the gamer learns while playing, and the learning doesn't take away from the motivational elements within the game that makes so much educational software disengaging.

David writes:

We might rightly argue that all meaningful learning always is secondary - it is not learning for the sake of learning, or for the sake of a grade, it is learning in the service of accomplishing some goal which helps an agent meet some purpose of their own.

Well I think that is what we strive for in education, isn't it? Making learning meaningful to people? I can't tell if David's being cynical, or indicting our school system, but to me "secondary" learning is not unvaluable learning, but rather learning besides what the instructor/designer intended. I'm in favor of designing valuble learning, and I'm pretty sure David is too. So let's design for intended learning objectives, shall we?

Show me a game that you argue has valuable "secondary" learning in it for implementing in schools, and I'll show you an entire curriculum of Space Invaders and a group of graduates that can't tie their own shoes.

lest we forget, learning is complex

2005-10-11T01:44:00.000-07:00

So this would be a continuation of Wiley's comments on my previous entry about games, learning activity and the alignment of objectives. First of all, I can't write as articulately as Dr. Wiley, and I appreciate his views. A few of my thoughts on some of what he brings up...

Let me first relate to what David thinks of the action-feedback loop that underlies all learning. This is what I first learned as basic schema theory, in that the way we interact with our environment is through a mechanism of perceiving our world, adjusting to what information we get, modifying what we know, then making an appropriate action. This is in slightly different order in what David mentions them, but basically its the same idea. What he calls "pattern-matching" and "purposive" on the part of the acting "agent" remains as some sort of black-box internal mechanism within the learner. Is there cognitive recognition and alignment on some cognitive level? Probably. Is an assessment made of how important this "new" information is to the learner? Almost assuredly. Okay, I can buy this, sounds very similar to most traditional cognitive theory.

The part I get lost in is his leap to the assertion of how an instructor, or the designer of instructional materials, has very little import/impact on the way information becomes learned, rather, that it is the "crafting of the messages" that are sent to the learner where the greatest contribution lies. The act of learning, in my view, is much more complex than the message design (although I don't doubt that the way information is chunked, packaged, and delivered can effect the way it is understood). To me, the complexity of learning lies in numerous other factors, such as the social context in which it is experienced, the way the information is experienced (was it through passivity? Activity? Reflection? Application?), and the artifacts that share, contribute, and distribute what is "understood" (just to name a few). To me, an explanation of the action-feedback loop, on the most basic level, helps inform how we interact with our immediate environment, but does very little to inform how we as human beings gain complex understandings of our world and of each other.

I wish that we could follow a model of singular instructional strategy that worked for everything, but I have yet to see one. Which brings me back to Gagne's assumptions that different types of learning exist and different conditions would lend themselves to different types of learning. I don't disagree with these assumptions, as to me they genuflect an assertion that instructional models better wield high flexibility and serve as a guide, rather than a solution for complex instruction (though, I'm definitely not an instructional designer, rather I'm an instructional technologist, so I don't claim to be a Gagne expert). This idea, too, as Wiley expresses it would seem to miss the point of having instructional games meet a determined or defined "pre-condition" deemed suitable for gaming, unless Wiley's claim is that a suitable condition is one in the learning objectives completely align with the gaming objectives. The example of trial-error learning within Sims environment is simply misplaced: the Sims games are not created for learning, and the learning that takes place during activity has proven to be of secondary importance if people are learning at all (see BECTA report, Kuirrimuir reports, among others). Why? The game doesn't have learning objectives, other than to be engaging (motivational) and to make money for the producers. Games not intended for learning have met with uninspiring results inside and outside the classroom; learning games based on reward systems without goal alignment tend to be boring and off-task. There could be excellent message design within the game, but they consistently fail to afford meaningful complex learning outcomes.

So if goal alignment is equivalent to "game-like instructional conditions," then I'm down with what Wiley is writing. This will include what type of interactions the learner has with the game, because it's the activity of the game that provides the necessary complexity, and therein lies the meaning the learner makes from the game (with help from all of those other handy ID tools that drive the "matching" to previous experiences and lend "importance" to the information presented). If the interaction relies too much on collecting coins or building zoning areas to learn electromagnetism, or Crime and Punishment, or Van Gogh, then it's not going to be effective. And I think the perspective we should take lies far beyond a description of messages sent back and forth from learner to instructional artifact. We should have loftier goals.

confirmation on the importance for simulation "alignment"

2005-10-06T16:38:00.000-07:00

Yeah, that's a horrible title, but whatever.

So, this isn't really going to mean a whole lot to people out there who might be reading this (although, since I don't think too many people are reading, I think if you bear with me, it'll be okay), but I got all excited today because I was reviewing a piece by Andy Gibbons about how a critical check during "waves" of simulation design should be looking for alignment.

Specifically, the Instructional Alignment of the simulation to the learning objective is a check-point to make sure the design is on the right track. "Does the simulation environment and model structure match the performance and knowledge goals of instruction? Will solving problems in the environment provide the right types and amounts of practice and the needed instructional feature support?" (Gibbons & Fairweather 1998 Chapt 22 Computer-based Instruction: Design and Development).

Well, by golly, this has been my approach all along for the design of instructional games (yes, simulations and games are different, apologies to Rob Foshay who told me games are just simulations with fuzzier focus on outcomes and are therefore necessarily less effective learning tools--huh I say--the approach to simulation design and game design have been as different as a tennis ball and a piece of fruit, so there's more than just adding game-like elements to make it better-and-worse at the same time, but I digress, actually I have a lot to say on this). Back to my point.

I have been pounding on my students that when the goals of the instructional activity are closely aligned with those of the game activity, that you can have an effective mix of learning and gameplay. The result? An activity that looks and feels engaging (dare I use the term "high flow"?) while instructional too. Of course, this is easier said than done. And hardly ever put into practice.

The game studies that make it into my field still look at commercial games (NOT designed for instruction) used in classrooms to teach [whatever--"problem solving" or "resource management" or "social skills" insert a side-show learning effort example] it all really doesn't work in terms of directed instructional objectives. There's just anecdotal influences of social learning or more enthusiasm in the activity (duh, it's a game folks, do we have to revisit why games continue to engage people? They're fun. It's ad naseum already!) The side of the spectrum stands the games designed to teach something, that don't turn out to be all that fun. Why might that be? Because they're so focused on traditional instructional design "strategies" that they disengage the learner from the game activity. I use "strategy" in quotes here because I'm not at all convinced that many of the activities that are associated with ID are necessary, interruptive assessments being one of them, but others that are important like reflective exercises or application of principles, again I'm going tangent here.

... And then there's the few instructional games in the middle that use gameplay elements in a learning activity that aren't aligned with learning objectives at all, they're just game-like elements attached to another unrelated activity in order to make the activity more engaging. (Actually, I'm not sure if those are "in the middle of the spectrum" or not, I haven't drawn that up yet.) For example, putting students in a 1st person shooter maze and asking them to race to the finish line through correctly modeled organic chemistry pictures on the doors (see Bradley's work at Drexler). Or moving through a MUD collecting points/coins so that I can get to enhance my character, even though I'm there to study why all the people in the town are dying out (see River project at MIT). So, I'm not saying that getting a cookie for doing a good job can't be effective for learning some things, but not so much the complex activity that involves transfer of learning to new situations, contexts, cultures, yadda yadda yadda. It's for practice. It's giving motivational rewards for being good. I really think that can only take the learner so far, and not into complex learning arenas. Eventually, the motivation will only take the learner t h i s far, but not the whole way.

The alternative? Alignment, my friends. Align those goals with the goals of the game and work to integrate those other pesky instructional elements that help support the learner, provide reflection on activity, follows some sort of assessment strategy, all within the confines of the game's objectives. Impossible, you say? Perhaps, but we're giving it a run by making our Interactive Fiction piece to experience a classic text. What new ways might people interact with early 20th century American poetry? Let's find out!...

royal flush

2005-09-12T23:38:00.000-07:00

So my Jackpot experience was one for the books. I'm there to play golf (and try to help my foursome who aren't great golfers) in a benefit tournament, and instead I stay up all night playing poker at a 3-6 Texas hold 'em table. I wouldn't have stayed there all night, but I was getting very lucky and having a great time.

Did I say I was getting lucky? Yeah, to the tune of a royal flush. I don't expect to get another for a long time, but it was really quite thrilling. I even won 5% of the "bad beat" pot as a bonus, which came to around $260. Quite a nice amount for a small-time guy like myself. But it wasn't about the money, it was about seeing those cards turn over.

I was dealt a Ks Qs and in late position. I was raising the bet and I think 3 players called it back to me after the flop. The flop was something like 5c 10s Js. So I knew I was looking at a possible straight flush right there, but at this point I still have nothing. The odds of getting the flush here are something like 35% and I have an open straight draw so I believe everyone checked to me and I bet the three in which two people called. Now on 4th street, up pops the 9s so I get my straight flush (amazing) so no one is going to beat me at this point as I have the nuts, and the 2nd highest hand possible in the darn game. So here it checks to me and I bet the $6, one player folds and the other calls me down. He probably has a small spade in the hole thinking his flush is not good, but what the hey. In 3-6 most people will call you down for the heck of it because there's not much at stake, and it's almost impossible to bluff anyone out. However, earlier I had mucked probably 20 hands in a row and was talking loudly about how I hadn't had a hand to play in "for-ever!" which probably meant that most people thought that when I played a hand, it must be pretty decent. I'm a real tight player and all (what I wanted them to think) but I had been playing tight all night so they were pretty much right. Anyway, I digress... The guy calls and the dealer flips the river and there it is, the As, to make the royal flush. And I had the 9 to boot, which is whacky, but whatever, that doesn't matter. The guy checks to me again and I bet $6 again but who really cares at this point, I can't believe what I'm looking at. He hums, haws, calls and I flip them over saying something like, "I got the royal" and everyone at the table starts clapping and making a scene. Quite surreal. The room boss came over and set me up with the bonus and on top of everything else, I kept winning at each table I was moved to after that. Didn't go to any huge stake tables, as I'm way too much of a small timer to ever get into it (what a way that would be to make a living... pro gambler would be brutal!) but I must say it was quite a thrill and something I won't forget for a long time.

Got back to the room at 7am, left for golf at 8am, and let's just say that 18 holes later I was glad to be getting off the course. It was a scramble, but I was terrible and we finished way out of the money. Still, it was worth it.

I had stopped at a gas station in Burley on my way into Nevada and bought a $2 little Peruvian elephant carved out of semiprecious stone, for good luck. I kept him by my chips at the table the whole night. Now the elephant is perched in a place of honor on my bookshelf, all shiny and green.

school is back with a vengeance

2005-09-08T23:01:00.000-07:00

One bad haiku and then I'm going to Jackpot:

school's got no love for
the guy trying to do right, write
and be what school should

states I've visited

2005-08-23T02:07:00.000-07:00

Apparently I've visited 32 states. Funny, I don't remember them being red at the time. Hrumph, it felt like more than 62%.

found this from nice person, delara
create your own personalized map of the USA

procrastination quiz and goals

2005-08-22T23:52:00.000-07:00

Wasn't sure how I'd do on a procrastination quiz, so I took one! Check it out here.
Not bad, a 30 out of 100. What does this score mean? "Your overall score on this test appears to be low. It appears that you don't procrastinate very often. This is great, as procrastination can be a major setback in reaching your goals. There is still room for improvement, however, so be conscious of the times that you do procrastinate and make an effort to stay on track." Of course, Ricky Williams would say that setting goals is a waste of time, becasue it takes away from living in the moment. Yeah, thanks Ricky. Zen-stoopid. I would laugh but I'm too busy being utterly disappointed. But I digress....

It was a bit of a strange quiz because it asked about everything from academic success to relationships, cleaning house and things like exercise. Not sure how they're all related, but apparently the folks at Psychology Today do.

What book am I?

2005-08-14T18:26:00.000-07:00

You're The Great Gatsby!

by F. Scott Fitzgerald

Having grown up in immense wealth and privilege, the world is truly at
your doorstep. Instead of reveling in this life of luxury, however, you spend most of
your time mooning over a failed romance. The object of your affection is all but
worthless--a frivolous liar--but it matters not to you. You can paint any image of the
past you want and make it seem real. If you were a color of fishing boat light, you
would be green.

Take the Book Quiz
at the Blue Pyramid.

fair fare

2005-08-14T17:59:00.000-07:00

Oh man, last night we went to the county fair and spent the better part of 2 hours sampling the various cuisine. Started with the corn dog, then went to the BBQ hamburger. Followed up with 2 tacos (uno carne y uno pollo), a bag of mini doughnuts, a scone and cotton candy. Yeah, shocker that I don't feel all that good this morning. But it was worth it. The song from Templeton in Charlotte's Web says it all.

feast for the senses
people watching, veritible
smorgasboard --gasboard

my recurrent nightmares

2005-08-05T15:03:00.000-07:00

So, what's the deal with nightmares? Not supposed to get them when you're an adult, right? Well, I admit that I rarely wake up "screaming" like I might have as a child, but I still get them. Often. Most of the ones I remember have to do with not being able to protect a loved one, or seeing a loved one being killed. Who gets killed varies from close relative to good friend, and normally I don't see it coming. As in, we're enjoying a nice afternoon snowskiing or something, and all of a sudden I see my best buddy go over a cliff. That sudden, like I didn't even know it was going to happen. The worst are when someone is getting hurt (like being attacked) and I'm trying to reach them, but can't run fast enough. That happens a lot.

But that's just one example of a nightmare that I get. Sometimes just scary things are happening. Sometimes everything's normal but just a little bit "off," if that makes any sense. Some people I know admit to having a nightmare every once in a while, but I don't think they have them regularly like I do. So here's the most recent theories people have offered: I watch too many scary movies; I eat too late at night; I go to bed too late; I go to bed too early; it's too hot in my bedroom; I'm too stressed out; I'm a control freak. The last two reasons sound a little too psychobabblish to me. Most of the dream research I've looked at is very unscientific and relies mostly on unproven theory. I just wish they'd stop.

For an interesting idea on how to quell the nightmares, check out this Straight Dope article from Cecil Adams.

a great perspective on blogs

2005-07-20T15:02:00.000-07:00

This guy is simply fabulous. Love his stuff. Some choice opinions from his page:

Blog: The word "blog" is literally shorthand for "boring;" a vulgar, overused word that strikes your ear with the dull thud of a cudgel to the soft spot of a child. It's an abbreviation used by journalism drop outs to give legitimacy to their shallow opinions and amateur photography that seems to be permanently stuck in first draft hell. Looking in the archives of the blogs, one would expect someone who has been at it for years to slowly hone their craft and improve their writing and photographs, since it's usually safe to assume that if someone does something long enough, he or she will eventually not suck at it.

and further:
It's an unspoken rule that every blog must use the same layout as every other blog: long, slender columns of annoyingly condensed text, thousands of links to other blogs, plugs for sh*tty political books, and more links to yet more blogs...
If the thousands of mid-sentence links don't annoy you, the long slender columns of text will. Most of the screen on a blog is blank for an imaginary populace of readers still using 640x480 resolution. I didn't buy a 19" monitor to have 50% of its screen realestate pissed away on firing white pixels, you a**holes. They don't print books on receipt paper for a reason. Every time I see this layout, I want to choke the creator with my dry, crackled, and bleeding hands for making my fingers so calloused from having to keep scrolling the mouse wheel to read your dumb "blog."

Good stuff. Even though his own website looks suspiciously like a blog....

Amy Hempel quote

2005-07-12T18:44:00.000-07:00

"Aren't we all, I thought, somebody's harvest?"

I was reading Chuck Palahniuk's Stranger Than Fiction when he goes on about Amy Hempel and her work, including The Harvest which this quote is taken from. I agree with Chuck about, well, almost everything, but I think almost everyone might agree with him when he says that Ms. Hempel must painstakingly go over every sentence so that it takes moments for the reader to think about each separate expression. The quote above is one of those expressions for me.

Something to consider

2005-07-12T09:02:00.000-07:00

The Chronicle article of how blogs may negatively effect how people on job search committees think about you:
http://chronicle.com/jobs/2005/07/2005070801c.htm

My first reaction is that people like the author, Ivan Tribble (a pseudonym), don't really understand blogging and what people use blogs for. But on closer consideration, I guess whatever people write can be considered to say something about them, even if it's in jest, or creative, or whatever. Should you hold negative things against them? I wouldn't if I was on their search committee. But can you help but be influenced by some of what is written? It's a valid point, and something I should maybe think more about. Perhaps I should take greater care to keep my anonymity. Feels a little like the academic freedom walls are closing in a little tighter.

gimme the bean, baby

2005-07-01T10:00:00.000-07:00

Saw this over at profgrrrl, a vanilla quiz that hit right on the mark. Vanilla bean for me. Want to try? Take the vanillaology quiz.

You're a real go-getter!
Nothing slips by you because you’re on your game at all times. You know what’s right and what needs to be done and you take charge to make sure it happens.

When it comes to vanilla ice cream, the perfectionist in you demands that it taste exactly like vanilla ought to taste. If it doesn’t have the obvious presence of real vanilla, it won’t pass your test.

Your vanilla is Edy's Vanilla Bean. You’re most likely to swap spoons with other Vanilla Bean lovers or entertaining Vanilla enthusiasts.

Wait a minute, are you Monica Geller from Friends? Or maybe Alan from Two and a Half Men?

the short story I wish I had written

2005-06-28T22:09:00.000-07:00

Sticks by George Saunders. Brilliant.

lucky quote

2005-06-21T15:03:00.000-07:00

"It's hard to detect good luck -- it looks so much like something you've earned."
-- Fred A. Clark

Is good luck when preparation meets opportunity? Or is there something less scientific to it? One of my favorite superheroes when I was young was this Irish lassie in a head-to-toe green outfit that had the superpower of good fortune. Her name was "Shamrock" (first encountered her in Contest of Champions mini-series). Later another guy came along called "Longshot" that supposedly had a similar super power but he was from the future and was much less likable, in my opinion.

Any other favorite quotes about "luck" that anyone wants to share, I'd love to see them.

oh the lovely backfat

2005-06-21T14:52:00.000-07:00

I had the unfortunate timing to go through undergraduate during the flannel years that matched that certain Seattle sound. Oversized shirts and loose-fitting clothing, all of which was okay, especially since it was really cold where I went to school. But hey, I'm no fashion guru, and it suited me fine, but it's quite a bit different than current trends in clothing.

Not to sound like the grumpy old man that I am, but now-a-days, the ladies and guys aren't so modest with their clothing. That's not always a bad thing, too. But honestly, I figure that low-rise jeans should be worn rarely, if at all. And only by the 2% of the population that's beautiful enough to do it. The problem with fashion is that people wear things that their body just wasn't meant to wear. And you ladies and fellas that are sporting the backfat should take heed, leave the low-rise jeans on the rack, and wear something more flattering. I saw at least 2 people walking around today with rolls of lard hanging over the back of their jeans, and it's just disgusting.

Now let me set the record straight. I am not in that 2% of beautiful people that can wear those kinds of jeans, and I have plenty of backfat to go around. So I choose to compensate by NOT tucking-in and carefully sparing those that see me from having to look right at it. I'm definately FOR the freedom to wear whatever you want. I'm also definately FOR having the good taste not to have a cheese log over the back of my pants for everyone to see.

Katy's recommendations

2005-06-20T12:15:00.000-07:00

A longtime friend recently gave me some reading recommendations that I thought I'd share. She knows a good book, believe me:

Derrick Jensen -- "Walking on Water" "Language Older Than Words" "Culture of Make-Believe" Katy says: Not for the faint of heart, and definitely not light reading.

Zac Unger -- "Working Fire" Katy says: ...very true and funny.

Mary Roach -- "Stiff: The hidden life of the human cadaver" Katy says: I found [it] compelling and strangely addictive.

Katy says: My fiction tastes have run toward women writers lately-- Sue Monk Kidd and Alice Sebold. If you're interested in poetry, try Dorianne Laux or her husband, Joe Millar. Both excellent Eugene poets, widely published. I bet you'd like Millar's "Overtime."

Annie Dillard -- "Holy the Firm" Katy says: ...a great book of essays- I love her attention to detail and her ability to make the mundane sacred.

EDIT: She offers a few more...
"Sparrow" and "Children of God" by Mary Doria Russell
"Peace Like a River" by Leif Enger, Katy says: One I'd put up there with my all time faves like Duncan's "Brothers K" and "River Why," as well as "To Kill a Mockingbird."

There you have it!

Romance and Reality, finally the two shall meet

2005-06-20T10:49:00.000-07:00

...at least, in the movies anyway. Just watched Closer last night and was really blown away by it. Probably one of the best movies I've seen in quite a while. The performances were really good, Clive Owen is just amazing, Natalie Portman did her usual great thing and I like Jude Law in almost everything he is in. Even Julia Roberts did an okay job, much better than her usual roles, but maybe that's because in this movie she actually had some smart things to say.
Which brings me to the "realistic" part. Okay, true, there's no way that a obituary columnist, a stripper, a photographer, and (especially) a dermatologist has that many great things to say. Almost every conversation had layers. Every phrase had biting wit. The writing was excellent in this way, and was the only thing that distracted from the realism. But it didn't bother me, I'll trade smart writing for realism any day.

Mostly, the reason this movie is so good is that it's one of the few big movies to treat love in a real way. It had believable situations with the way real men and women act, and treat physical love as the same (and different) than emotional love. It didn't have the bubblegum start, middle, or ending. The pace of the movie kept me involved. I found myself cringing and smiling at the same time, especially in the 2 scenes with Portman and Owen.

Someone told me that she didn't think I'd like it because I normally don't like the movies with cheating in them. That's true. But that's because in most movies, the cheating is somehow rewarded, or at least the cheater goes unpunished (Reality Bites comes to mind). Or even when they do, they still get taken back in the end, like in Unfaithful. That crap drives me nuts. In Closer, the characters don't pretend that love has its seediness, it's ugly side, and that people stop being people once they are in love. For that honestly alone, this was a great movie.

Love at first sight? Thought,
choice, action, and consequence
Closer to real life

game on!

2005-06-16T23:38:00.000-07:00

heroes on my dominoes

Purchased these "Super Heroes Dominoes" in a town that consisted completely of a gas station and trailer in the middle of Wyoming. They had "antiques" inside where you pay for the gas, and you had to pay $1 to get the key to the honey bucket outside. I mean, I know there's some pay toilets in Europe, but that's the first I'd ever seen it in the US. (What keeps you from taking a leak 20 ft. from the front door? I mean, there's nobody there. I digress...)

Anyway, they had loads of *junk* stacked on shelves in this place that had lots of dust everywhere. A nice old man was working the counter. I saw this box of dominoes up in the corner wedged between 15 year old dolls with no hair and asked him to get it down. Sometime later, working with gears of slow and stop, he retrieved it and helped me count the pieces to make sure there was a complete set. He wanted $20 dollars for it and I offered $14. A quick trip to the back to check with "ma" and I had my quirky toy. Bingo was his name-o. (The first thing I did when I got home was check them out on ebay to see what they were going for. I think I got ripped off. But what the hey, I'm pleased with them.)

I have them on the shelf in my office, so anytime anyone is ready for a rousing game, drop on by. Some strange combinations on these puppies. I wouldn't normally put Flash and Batgirl together, but somehow on a domino it just looks right.

Thanks to Doug for taking the pic.

World View quiz

2005-06-15T00:27:00.000-07:00

You scored as Postmodernist. Postmodernism is the belief in complete open interpretation. You see the universe as a collection of information with varying ways of putting it together. There is no absolute truth for you; even the most hardened facts are open to interpretation. Meaning relies on context and even the language you use to describe things should be subject to analysis.

You equally scored as Cultural Creative. Cultural Creatives are probably the newest group to enter this realm. You are a modern thinker who tends to shy away from organized religion but still feels as if there is something greater than ourselves. You are very spiritual, even if you are not religious. Life has a meaning outside of the rational.

Postmodernist

75%

Cultural Creative

75%

Modernist

50%

Materialist

50%

Existentialist

38%

Romanticist

38%

Idealist

25%

Fundamentalist

19%

What is Your World View? (updated)
created with QuizFarm.com

When you need to feel normal

2005-06-14T23:30:00.000-07:00

Sometimes you just need to feel like there's someone out there that spends their time doing stranger things than you are doing. Or perhaps you just take comfort in the notion that other people create things just as bizarre as what goes on in your own head. Or when hell, you just need to smile a little bit. A friend* turned me on to some crazy little animations a while back that I just revisited, and laughed all over again. Check 'em out:
Magical Trevor, MT2 and Aaaaaaahaha.
And I highly recommend her blog for interesting reading, for anyone out there that's interested in life in higher ed and otherwise.

*Well, I don't want to be presumptuous, in case she reads this. I guess she is more of an acquaintance, since we only got to hang out for a short while. But we were friend-ly, at least, and since I recognize that I'm not the warmest person in the world and she managed to make me laugh, I'm thinking that she must be pretty cool.

This trackback thing...

2005-06-12T15:35:00.000-07:00

...is more trouble than its worth....
I just did my own little trackback to the Nerfman post to this one, and I can see why most people don't use the feature. It's just too cumbersome. Unless it's a very serious conversation, or work-related, I wouldn't expect it to be used so much. But at least I know how now.
The biggest bottleneck seems to be with having to login to Haloscan to do it. Does everyone have to use Haloscan to make a trackback? I think so, at least at this point. Maybe in the future they'll make it easier.

the subservient chicken...

2005-06-10T12:41:00.000-07:00

...is found here, thanks to Mr. Buckley. Oh, the Colonel with his wee beady eyes. "You're going to eat my chicken..." I tried to make him do some pretty irreverent stuff and all I got back was an approach to the camera and a stare. The biggest question is: why would Burger King sponsor such a website?

Nerfman, my hero

2005-06-09T12:44:00.000-07:00

Nerfman rocks!

Anyone remember Nerfman? I have him safely in a box (my cats would loooove to destroy him) but what I really want to do is play with him. My Nerfman is in remarkably good shape even after throwing him into walls numerous, numerous times. Seemed like the perfect toy: safe for indoor throwing, and an action figure to boot. I found this picture here.

But if you're into strange toys (people often ask me where I procured my Sigmund Freud, Ben Franklin, and Albert Einstein action figures) there's no better shop than in my old stomping grounds. In fact, Archie McPhee might be the greatest store ever.

the land of Boz

2005-06-06T15:19:00.000-07:00

Just saw the remake of The Longest Yard. Normally I would object to going to one of these fashionable remakes that never lives up to the original. But I was in the mood for a no-thinker (see previous post) and if it was even close to as good as the classic original, then I would enjoy myself.
...And for the most part I did enjoy myself. Some good lines, stupid sexist humor, but definitely poked fun at itself which was nice. The worst part was the role of Brian Bosworth, not because he's a horrible actor, but just because he was in it.

For those that remember (and I know all you Seahawks fans do), Bosworth was a draft lottery pick by Chuck Knox and the 'Hawks back sometime in the late 80s or early 90s. He came out of Oklahoma with an unprecedented hype, cool haircut, and bad attitude. He claimed he would not play for any team that wasn't on his "list" but somehow agreed to play for Seattle anyway after they guaranteed him something like 11M over 8 years. Well, I think he only played for a year and a half, or something, before hurting his shoulder and leaving the 'Hawks high and dry. He, of course, got paid the full amount.

Now I'm not claiming that he wasn't hurt or that he just wanted the money without playing. I think he probably did want to be a great NFL player. But the hype he created around himself was much larger than anything he could hope to deliver, which just left everyone disappointed. I still have my "Land of Boz" poster rolled up in my basement. He was going to deliver the Seahawks to playoff winning circles. And all I can think about is how Bo Jackson ran over and around him in the Kingdome. The very last thing I want to do is see him in a movie. He played a "bad" guy, one of the guards who played against our hero Crewe, which did seem appropriate. What would have been sweet justice is if the final touchdown had been directly over the top of Boz instead of Bill "roid" Romanowski.

not thinking too hard

2005-06-06T15:13:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I'm quite humbled about the level of thinking my friends do when posting to their blog. I'm most definitely into not thinking too much right now. I apologize to anyone looking for The English Patient while I'm giving Sack Lunch. "You know, sex in a tub?...that doesn't work."

A Piece of Cake

2005-06-04T10:09:00.000-07:00

A Piece of Cake, a piece of fiction

I wouldn’t eat that, she said. It made her a little sick when she had a piece, something like upset stomach is what she mentioned. The top of the cake was a year old. I unwrapped it gingerly so as to not disturb the frosting. Layer after layer of aluminum foil, then plastic wrap. The freezing process had left the basket-weave decoration of the white buttercream icing intact, the four layers of amaretto chocolate were still moist to the extent that the cake hardly had any little crumbles avalanche down the radius as I cut a generous piece. I slid my slice onto a paper plate and picked up a fork. It was tradition.

When the previous August had come to a close, it marked the first full summer in our new home together and everything was still fresh. A honeymoon in Jamaica, and a move to the suburbs where we could both commute to our new jobs in opposite directions. In moving here, she sacrificed her position on the corporate ladder to accept one with slightly less potential and less prestige, but closer to where I found work. The choice in location only seemed fair. After all, it was me who had put up with the outrageous commute for the two years previous, spending half of my weekend driving up to the city where she had taken a job. Just to spend a day or two a month with her. It was worth it. After we were married, it seemed right that a compromise in location was the decision to make. I know she didn’t like our location, but I thought it was working out pretty well. Now the commute was only slightly inconvenient for both of us. I took a bite of cake.

In November we took a trip to the coast. It was breezy with autumn but the pier amusement park was still in full swing. Tourists lined up to win cheap prizes that had corporate logos stitched into their furry chests. A long walk along the beach turned chilly as the dusk came and went. She had changed her mind, she said. She wanted to put off a family for three, maybe four years. After all, we had time, and this way we could enjoy the married life even longer. She reminded me how we needed to get established first, after all, what was all that school for if we weren’t going to take advantage of it? It was a good point. She’s always been practical that way. I could handle it. I took another bite of cake.

It was sometime in February that she didn’t call. Her business trips often take her out of town, but she was usually pretty good about saying goodnight and talking about her conference activities. It was no big deal. She had met an old friend from her undergraduate days and went out for drinks. When she got back, she was tired and just forgot. He was just an old friend. It was only a few drinks. She just forgot. I took another bite of cake.

In April we went to another wedding, the first we’d been to since our own. She looked absolutely stunning in a dress that was modest—to the extent that I worried that she would attract more attention than the bride herself. She looked simple, and regal, and this was the way she has always looked to me. I knew that in fifty years, I would still be attracted to her dark blonde curls, her kelly green eyes. Somehow we ended up in an argument at the reception. Something about how she was spending too much on frivolous items, while I didn’t care about what she thought was important. Later, I was around the corner when I heard her tell one of my friends that I was cheap.

Even after a year the cake tasted very good. The chocolate still had the bitterness of the dark bean and the icing was smooth and light. The cake was every bit as palatable as the first night we ate it. The first night, at our reception, when we chose not to smear it in each others’ faces. That night we used forks and offered the first bite to each other with the love and tenderness that our relationship had, that it would continue to have. Now, tasting the cake again, it still had that wonderful texture and flavor of the very first bite. I devoured each forkful with unexpected hunger until the paper plate had nothing left but a few chocolaty smears. I barely made it to the bathroom before I threw up.

Nada Fiction

2005-06-04T10:04:00.000-07:00

From time to time I like to write little fictional storylets. They’re not full stories, they’re too short for that. But sometimes I wake up from a night full of ‘mares and the only thing to do is to write a bunch of stuff, usually from someone else’s perspective. But for people who might read this and who know my real identity, you should disassociate me and truth from the storylets.

The brilliant Roger Clyne wrote in his lyrics to “Nada”:

There ain’t no moral to this story at all
and everything I tell you very well could be a lie.
There ain’t no morals to these stories at all
And everything I tell you, you can bet will be a lie.

Well, that’s how I write stories too. It’s fiction. Of course, if you believe that everything I write is a lie, then you can't believe that everything I write is a lie.

scrumtrelescent

2005-06-03T12:24:00.000-07:00

One of those things that might only be funny to 49% of the population: the Bud Light real men of genius commercials. A few of my favorites include Mr. Giant Taco Salad Inventor, Mr. Male Football Cheerleader, Mr. Silent Killer Gas Passer and Mr. All You Can Eat Buffet Inventor. I know, I know. I'm so easily amused.

time she's a-movin

2005-06-02T10:35:00.000-07:00

S: Hey, what up? How's your summer going?
B: Pretty sweet so far. Went out to visit friends in the east, then went out to visit friends in the west.
S: That's a bit of travel. You're not known for your comfortable flying.
B: Tell me about it. One day I took off and landed 3 different times. That's a lot of praying for me. And I had left my Greek worry beads at home. Not good.
S: Well now that you're back, I suppose you're getting a lot done. Getting all those preps finished for the fall. You have all those books you can finish now. You have a buttload of articles to finish and grants to investigate. The landscaping needs... well, you need landscaping. How's it all coming?
B: Do you know what the word "nada" means?
S: Isn't that a light chicken gravy? C'mon, man, if you're worried about it, maybe you should spend less time thinking of terrible haikus and more time planting high-elevation shrubbery.
B:
all the work looming
with my head wrapped in writing
double entendre

Revenge of the Sith premiere

2005-05-19T11:04:00.000-07:00

Last night I went to my first midnight premiere of a movie, ever, and it will probably be my last. Not so much because I can't get excited about a movie, but more because the kind of people that go to these premieres. You had your "gotta be cool" kind of high schoolers that think barking out irreverent phrases is going to increase their rank in their social hierarchy. You have your mid-40s single guys with nothing better to do than to don a giant cloak and mutter to people passing, "These aren't the droids you're looking for." You have your young parents of 2 poor children--parents who were too lazy to find a sitter so consequently will be scarred for life after having to look into the rotting face of the Emporer and sending lighting bolts into the character that all their favorite toys are based upon. It was pretty much chaos.

As for the movie, it was pretty good. Satisfying if not a bit anticlimactic. But what would you expect when you already know how it ends?

Anni becomes Darth
light sabers whoom, whoom-whoom-whoom
it's a slight thumbs-up

a chicken and egg problem

2005-05-18T15:31:00.000-07:00

Except that literally, this time, it's a chicken and egg problem. The question being: why doesn't chicken taste more like egg? Or perhaps the question should be: why doesn't egg taste more like chicken? I mean, shouldn't egg salad taste similar to chicken salad (and vice-versa)?

Along those lines, shouldn't the same things taste good on both? So, shouldn't we be rolling eggs around in Shake-n-Bake before we fry them? People use Tobasco and salsa with eggs, sometimes, but it's not really the same kind of buffalo sauce they use on hot wings. And why don't we drink white wine with eggs like we do with chicken? We eat sausage or bacon with eggs, but not with chicken. That would be "two kinds of meat." So why aren't eggs considered meat?

which came first no one
can say, let's fire the grill and
barbeque some eggs

2005-05-17T17:46:00.000-07:00

Haloscan commenting and trackback have been added to this blog.

Unfortunately, it looks like doing this little addition has blown up all my previous comments. What the hey?! I'll work on the problem and see if I can fix it....

Monday humor (on a Tuesday)

2005-05-17T10:24:00.000-07:00

I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.

Thanks for the chuckle, Seeker

wedding songs

2005-05-12T12:39:00.000-07:00

Coming up on my 1st year anniversary, and preparing to attend a wedding of another friend, the subject of wedding songs has been occupying my mind recently.

Not just wedding songs that I don’t want played (like those really lame ones on the “do not play” list such as Funky Chicken, Macarena, Hokey Pokey, Mony Mony, etc. that I’ve threatened the DJ with). But I mean the all-important 1st dance wedding song that is forever designated as “your song” whenever it comes up in conversation or you happen to hear it over the radio.

My first question: is it all that important? I mean, maybe a lot of gentlemen don’t care about what their song is, or wouldn’t even be able to tell you what song was played at their wedding. But the thing is, if I hadn’t helped in choosing it, I would have ended up with something from Clay Aiken and it would have ruined my entire evening. So I almost had to care.
Besides, I admit that I’ve given it some thought over the years, and I always thought I wanted a song that was different from everyone else’s, that held meaning for us as a couple, and that I personally liked. Well, these criteria help to narrow the list down considerably. Which brings me to…

My second question: is the subject of the song a deal-breaker? I’ve always liked slow songs that had relatively melancholy topics or an air of eeriness about them rather than love, for the sake of love. For instance, I tend to gravitate towards songs like
Tomorrow, Wendy
Here You Me
Champaign High
all songs of which are about loss. Then there’s my other favorite kind of slow tune like
Quicksand Jesus
Home Sweet Home
Sanitarium
which are metal-ballads and don’t fall completely in-line with the category of “sweet and melodic.”

Another way to go would be to go with Barry Manilo which some people would immediately cringe at, either because they think his music is lame or because 20 years ago people everywhere used “Weekend in New England” as their song, and it’s just too done already. I admit to having a Barry Manilo in between my Metallica and Tool CD’s, right next to my Abba, so it’s not that I’d be totally displeased with such a selection. But I think I should be a little more original than that. Choosing “Faithfully” from Journey is just so junior high…

Or I could have just thrown caution to the wind and said, “Hey, I happen to really enjoy this song and I don’t care what people say, we’re going to dance to ‘Stinkfist!’”

So to recap, when choosing a wedding song: should the guy care? If so, should he care about the song’s melodic quality? The subject matter? Should he be thinking about originality? Does anyone besides me even remember what wedding song I ultimately chose? Aren't you just dying to know? :)

best quiz ever(?)

2005-05-10T15:46:00.000-07:00

I dunno, Wiley. Says I'm sarcastic an cynical. Yeah, whatever! I'm reeeealy impressed.

No use trying to fight it, you're an eight-sided die, a d8. A fine example of simple elegance, the d8 is one of the least appreciated types of dice, and is often neglected. You are known to be quiet and shy, outward traits that conceal viscous sarcasm and mean wit. You are very smart, yet wise enough to hide your intelligence the quicker they found out how smart you are, the sooner they'll put you to work, which is something you can do without. People call you dark and pessimistic, or moody and cynical. You find little point in arguing.

Take the quiz at dicepool.com

(The best part is this explanation at the bottom:)

This survey is completely scientific. Despite the mind-boggling complexity of mankind, the billions of distinctly different personalities found on Earth can easily be divided into seven simple categories that correspond to the five Platonic solids, a pseudo polyhedron, and whatever the hell a d100 is. The results of this quiz should be considered not only meaningful but also infallible, and pertinent to your success as a fully realized individual. If you feel the results of this examination do not match your perceived personality, you should take whatever drastic measures are needed to cram your superego back into proper alignment, as described by the quiz results.

And if you believe that, we have some really great critical-hit insurance to sell you.

college NASCAR

2005-05-09T13:09:00.000-07:00

Friends and I were talking the other night about how some of the smaller state schools can expect to compete with the money-making sports that many of the larger schools produce. An extrodinary amount of revenue is generated for those schools who have huge programs in basketball and football. The students and faculty at my school could certainly benefit from that kind of money, which gets diverted into facilities and programs that all campus people benefit from.

So then, what's the deal with NASCAR. I've seen articles that proclaim how NASCAR makes more money, and has a larger U.S. fan base, than any other professional specatator sport. Hunderds of thousands of people participate in these weekly events, and millions more form a TV audience that rake in advertising dollars. So...why not a college racing series? This would be a chance for smaller schools--that have a large contingent of students who are drawn to land-grant and agriculture kinds of places--to earn the kind of dollars in a sport where they might excel at automotive-related events. It could become huge.

Schmidt's lament

2005-05-05T13:01:00.000-07:00

I know the movie "About Schmidt" wasn't for everybody, but for me it was one of those pictures that got better the 2nd, 3rd, and 4th time I saw it. Especially poignant was the part near the beginning where he narrates his thoughts about what the future held for him as a young man. Paraphrasing, he felt that destiny had hand-picked him to do something special in this world. That somehow he had the feeling that he would accompish something special in his time on earth, that he was tapped by fate to do something [anything] great.

As the movie goes on, we quickly come to realize that a successful stint as an actuary for a large insurance company, a caring wife and an emotionally distant daughter, don't exactly measure to his adolescent expectations of his time on earth. I don't want to argue that being a father or a productive member of society is "important" or "special" in its own right.

Instead, I'm wondering how common is this feeling? Do most people grow up with this same notion? I completely relate to having this feeling as a young man, progressing through school and wondering exactly how destiny had picked me to do something great. As I continued into college, I admit I referenced this feeling less and less, perhaps because I felt that the approaching day must be getting ever closer to where "it" would happen. I would know how my great influence on the world would be felt. Yet I personally knew it wasn't any closer, didn't feel it was right around the corner from me, and even worse I didn't know how to take myself there.

In reflection, these lost feelings of missing destiny's calling might have been part of what took me back into graduate school, thus prolonging my chances yet a few more years to realize what great gift I was supposed to bestow on society. At what point in life do people resign themselves to what they are, or accept what they will be? That perhaps destiny did not tap your shoulder? That you are instead simply one of the vast majority who is to ride in the oceanic tides of human existance, just bobbing along with all the others, letting external forces dictate all of what happens to you and everyone around you?

And more importantly, how are you supposed to feel when you finally accept that your realized existance is nowhere near your previously expected, unfulfilled calling? Is this a trick we play on ourselves, or is this the idea that someone long ago teaches us in the hope that some people, at some time or another, achieve their pre-progammed influences on the rest of society and pass through life altogether satisfied?

{originally posted on March 9, 2004}

rise against cranberry

2005-05-03T10:41:00.000-07:00

There is just no way, no way that we should be mixing meats and sweet tasty things. I don't know who came up with the whole lamb-and-mint-jelly thing, but I have to draw the line when it comes to wholesome holidays like Thanksgiving. A colleague mentioned today how much she enjoyed cranberry sauce on her turkey. That's just wrong, wrong, wrong. First, I'm pretty sure that the only thing that should be touching the turkey is gravy. Gravy pretty much can go on anything meaty and be okay. But certainly not cranberry.

I think maybe the greatest invention man has ever made isn't the lightbulb, or the computer, or even indoor plumbing. It has to be those sectioned plates that keep the food from touching. I remember as a kid I would eat around every serving carefully avoiding anything that is in close placement to another piece of food. The mixture of tastes was revolting. Those plates that keep the food in their own little compartment...ahhhh, now that's how food was meant to be enjoyed. The folks at Lunchables got it right. Remember the argument, "Well, it all mixes in your stomach anyway." I don't even want to get into the absurdity of that comment. Since when do you taste things in your stomach? Idiocy.

So really, I have nothing against cranberry. The yams are horrible too. If you're going to have yams and cranberry, all I ask is that you use a separate plate for them. And be sure that they don't touch each other, either.